• Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to footer

Christian Concepts

Bringing your Potential to Light

  • Start Here
  • Insights
  • About
  • Subscribe

Are You Selfish, Self-Neglectful, Or Selfless?

August 30, 2020 by Matt Pavlik 1 Comment

Selfishness at its root is wastefulness. Poor stewardship is the misuse of resources. Gluttony is a perfect example of selfishness. You are selfish if you consume more than you need while others don’t get what they really need.

The selfish person refuses to do what is helpful and right. He prioritizes his wants over another person’s needs. Selfishness overlaps with pride. A selfish person might throw away good food instead of giving it away to those in need. It’s deliberately spiteful or intent on seeing others suffer.

With such a bleak definition, you might be thinking, “I’m not that selfish.” And maybe you’re right. Instead, maybe you are self-neglectful. Would you starve yourself so another can eat? That doesn’t sound any better than letting others starve.

The selfish person can’t be thankful. Being thankful allows you to see the abundance of what you have. Take a moment to consider the excess you have. Most people have well beyond what they need to be happy. Yet, many people aren’t happy. What will it take for you to be happy?

Selfishness can also have a fearful root. True happiness is living with peace in any circumstance. It’s the ability to be content. It’s impossible (or nearly impossible) to be content and selfish at the same time. Paul wrote about contentment:

I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength.

Philippians 4:11-13 NIV

Because of sin, it’s easy to be selfish. Because of sin, it’s also easy to give others exactly what they want (to avoid any uncomfortable conflict). But can you be generous and have healthy boundaries at the same time? You can because Self-care isn’t selfish. With God’s help, your motives for giving can be free of resentment, bitterness, or anything negative.

So I have decided to ask Titus and the others to spend some time with you before I arrive. This way they can arrange to collect the money you have promised. Then you will have the chance to give because you want to, and not because you feel forced to. Remember this saying, “A few seeds make a small harvest, but a lot of seeds make a big harvest.” Each of you must make up your own mind about how much to give. But don’t feel sorry that you must give and don’t feel that you are forced to give. God loves people who love to give.

2 Corinthians 9:5-7 CEV

God wants you to be selfless. That means you work toward being a good steward of the resources God has given you. You know the difference between what you need and what you want. You derive your happiness from the abundance of what you already have. You share what you have to those who have need. You give to others only when your giving helps instead of creating further harm. You allow yourself to enjoy the life God has given you.

When you are focused on God and His kingdom, you can be happy and content whether you are in need or you have plenty.

Image by Ulrike Mai from Pixabay

Matt Pavlik on FacebookMatt Pavlik on LinkedinMatt Pavlik on PinterestMatt Pavlik on Twitter
Matt Pavlik
Matt Pavlik
Christian Counselor - New Reflections Counseling
Matt Pavlik is a licensed professional clinical counselor who wants to see each individual restored to their true identity. He has more than 15 years of experience counseling individuals and couples at his Christian counseling practice, New Reflections Counseling. Matt and Georgette have been married since 1999 and live with their four children in Centerville, Ohio.

Matt’s courses and books:
shop.christianconcepts.com ToIdentityAndBeyond.com ConfidentIdentity.com MarriageFromRootsToFruits.com
contain practical exercises that help God’s truth spring to life.

Filed Under: Spiritual Formation, Core Longings, God's Kingdom, Identity Tagged With: suffering

Reader Interactions

Trackbacks

  1. Be Assertive Even When You Don't Feel Like It - Christian Concepts says:
    May 17, 2021 at 3:02 am

    […] Read more about selfishness.Image by Ryan McGuire from Pixabay […]

    Reply

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Primary Sidebar

Recent Posts

  • Proactively Pull Triggers to Prevent Pushing Buttons
  • Choose Faith When All Seems Pointless
  • Perspective Matters More Than You Think
  • 3 Signs Of A Healthy Emotional Life
  • Move Beyond Depression Guaranteed

Recent Comments

  • How To Grow More Confident - Christian Concepts on Consider This Confident Attitude
  • Proactively Pull Triggers to Prevent Pushing Buttons - Christian Concepts on 3 Signs Of A Healthy Emotional Life
  • 3 Ways Two Identities Become One - Christian Concepts on How Two Identities Resolve Conflict
  • Choose Faith When All Seems Pointless - Christian Concepts on Demonstrate Faith To Complete Your Training
  • Matt Pavlik on 3 Signs Of A Healthy Emotional Life

Topics

  • Abuse and Neglect
  • Betrayal
  • Boundaries
  • Conflict Resolution
  • Core Longings
  • Counseling
  • Dating to Find a Mate
  • Emotional Honesty
  • Eternal Security
  • God's Kingdom
  • Healing
  • Identity
  • Marriage
  • Self-Care
  • Self-Image
  • Spiritual Formation

Archives

  • January 2023
  • December 2022
  • November 2022
  • October 2022
  • September 2022
  • August 2022
  • July 2022
  • June 2022
  • May 2022
  • April 2022
  • March 2022
  • February 2022
  • January 2022
  • October 2021
  • September 2021
  • August 2021
  • July 2021
  • June 2021
  • May 2021
  • April 2021
  • March 2021
  • February 2021
  • January 2021
  • December 2020
  • November 2020
  • October 2020
  • September 2020
  • August 2020
  • July 2020
  • June 2020
  • May 2020
  • April 2020
  • March 2020
  • February 2020
  • January 2020
  • December 2019
  • November 2019
  • October 2019
  • September 2019
  • August 2019
  • July 2019
  • June 2019
  • May 2019
  • April 2019
  • March 2019
  • February 2019
  • January 2019
  • December 2018
  • November 2018
  • October 2018
  • September 2018
  • August 2018
  • July 2018
  • June 2018
  • May 2018
  • April 2018
  • September 2017
  • March 2015
  • February 2015
  • January 2015
  • December 2014
  • June 2012
  • April 2012
  • March 2012
  • January 2012
  • December 2011
  • September 2011
  • August 2011
  • July 2011
  • June 2011
  • May 2011
  • April 2011
  • February 2011
  • December 2010
  • November 2010
  • October 2010
  • July 2010
  • June 2010
  • May 2009
  • April 2009
  • March 2009

Footer

Follow

  • Facebook
  • LinkedIn
  • Pinterest
  • Twitter

© 2003–2023 · New Reflections Counseling, Inc. · Christian Concepts Publishing · Privacy Policy