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Bringing your Potential to Light

Identity

How to Overcome Negativity

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Think of a profound, life-changing moment. What took place that made such a difference? I’ll bet the moment had something to do with accepting yourself the way God made you. Seeing yourself from a fresh perspective (God’s perspective) changes your life.

These moments don’t happen all the time, but you can make a leap forward today. What are some signs that you are due for one of these incredible moments?

I could list off a bunch of symptoms, but the end result to watch for is a heaviness brought on by negativity. Are you consistently pessimistic or discouraged? Are you consistently feeling rejected or unwanted? Does it feel like a cloud of doom is following you around?

Negativity becomes a real problem when it becomes a normal way of life. You can’t feel great all the time, but you shouldn’t be thinking that you “just have a negative personality.” Negativity isn’t a permanent problem; it’s a weight you weren’t meant to carry.

You have blind spots for good reason. Only God is omnipresent (a fancy way to say He is all-seeing). But having blind spots doesn’t mean you have to settle for ruts in your thinking.

Can you be so familiar with how you feel about yourself that you are unaware of a bias against yourself? It feels so normal it goes undetected. I do it all the time and I’m guessing you do too.

The negative bias you are carrying is a heavy load. Jesus has something to say about heavy loads. He says drop them when they serve no purpose or they block you from the life He intends.

“Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”

Matthew 11:28-30 ESV

Jesus wants you to thrive. Immediately after these verses, chapter 12 has several stories of how the Pharisees put heavy burdens on their people. Jesus doesn’t want you to be weighed down with man-made rules and requirements.

The question to ask becomes, “What rules, requirements, and burdens am I carrying that are completely unnecessary?”

God wants us to be anxious for nothing. Acceptance is the antidote to worry. If you can accept God for who He is and yourself for who He made you to be, you are most of the way there (toward loving your neighbor as yourself). When you accept someone you love them. Self-acceptance both rejects who you aren’t and embraces who you are.

If you want to dig deeper into this, work through my book Confident Identity: Christian Strategies to Forget Who You Aren’t and Discover Who You Really Are. To take one step further, read this post I wrote last year:

Find and Accept Your True Self

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Where Are You God?

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Have you ever lost something important and then developed a near panic when you couldn’t find it?

In the Fellowship of the Ring, Bilbo has a moment when he can’t find The Ring. He looks all over for it and works himself into a frenzy. He finds it in his pocket (where he left it) after only a few minutes.

When you’ve lost something important, a few anxious minutes can feel like an eternity. When this happens, more than a physical sensation is involved. A spirit of fear can take hold. Before you know it, you can believe you are doomed.

In Luke 15, Jesus tells several parables about us being lost and the rejoicing that happens when we repent and move toward God. While Jesus never worries or panics, it is clear that He misses us when we become distracted with life and forget about Him.

From our perspective, isn’t it usually the other way around? We think we know where we are and we declare that God is missing.

I can’t feel God anymore. God, are you there? It doesn’t feel like you are there. Don’t you care that I’m suffering?

This reminds me of Mary when her brother Lazarus died. “Lord, if only you had been here, my brother would not have died” (John 11:32). She is hurting and disappointed. But she knows that God’s presence makes all the difference.

When God is present, it is first a spiritual experience and second an emotional experience. If you find yourself all alone in the sense that you can’t feel God’s presence, you might be tuned to the wrong channel.

If you only go looking for God with your feelings, you might miss Him. He’s always there, but you can’t always feel Him. You can read the Bible and know He will never abandon you. But I’m talking about something different.

When Jesus left us, He sent His Holy Spirit to be with us.

And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Advocate, who will never leave you. He is the Holy Spirit, who leads into all truth. The world cannot receive him, because it isn’t looking for him and doesn’t recognize him. But you know him, because he lives with you now and later will be in you. No, I will not abandon you as orphans—I will come to you.

John 14:16-18 NLT

As believers, we can sense God’s presence without necessarily feeling God’s presence.

I believe in the sun even when it’s not shining. I believe in love even when not feeling it. I believe in God even when He is silent.

Anonymous

The next time you feel like God is absent, try reaching out with your spiritual senses. Affirm God is with you spiritually. Then ask the Holy Spirit to teach you about God’s truth and love.

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All Things New

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A traumatic event is not easily forgotten. As you begin this new year, what is one thing you’d like to forget?

If you’re in a car accident, your car doesn’t fix itself. If your tooth develops a cavity, the decay needs to be removed. When something breaks, you must decide what to do with it. Can it be restored? Is there hope, or are you better off cutting your losses?

If nothing will ever change, then hope will be impossible. Then all that remains is suffering.

God introduces the needed change.

I am creating something new. There it is! Do you see it?

I have put roads in deserts, streams in thirsty lands.

Isaiah 43:19 CEV

Because God is making us anew, hope is inevitable. You can change. You don’t have to remain stuck and hopeless. God is rehabilitating you. God wants you to feel hopeful.

Anyone who belongs to Christ is a new person. The past is forgotten, and everything is new.

2 Corinthians 5:17 CEV

Forget what happened long ago! Don’t think about the past.

Isaiah 43:18 CEV

The more you can leave behind your past, the better you will be. “Leave behind” is a loaded phrase. It takes significant emotional work to leave behind difficult experiences (memories).

Therefore, to move forward, you first need to move backward. If your carpet is dirty and worn, you need to rip it out before you can install new carpet.

Grieving is the work of leaving behind. Once that raggedy carpet is gone, you can forget about it. But you don’t want to completely forget about it, otherwise, you’ll be more likely to repeat an accident (like spilling grape juice).

Grieving allows you to remember the lesson, but forget about the discomfort and shame. Forget about it. Don’t worry about it. You are free. Once you are free, you are open to all that God has for you.

What is one new thing you want God to do in your life this year?

The Paradox of Humility

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No one can claim they are the humblest person in the world with much credibility. But those of us who struggle with self-worth know that confidence is equally elusive.

Somehow though, confidence and humility are the same thing. If you are confident (but not arrogant), you’ll also be humble. And if you’re humble (but not engaging in false humility), you’ll also be confident.

Doesn’t that seem strange that appropriate confidence, the kind God wants us to have, is also a way to express humility? I mean strange in the sense that confident probably isn’t the first word that comes to mind when you think of humility. But how could it be any other way?

God who is all powerful clothed Himself with humanity. If there is a paradox, Jesus represents it perfectly.

To be strong doesn’t mean to be closed or unreachable. God’s strength is approachable. Jesus’s birth offers us the greatest hope possible.

We are creatures of habit. Once we know how to do something, we go on autopilot.

If you’ve ever experienced a negative, false belief about yourself, you know firsthand the intense struggle that is required to put off the false and put on the truth.

You can’t have confidence and humility without also having peace and joy.

Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light.”

Matthew 11:28-30 NLT

In your quest to become more confident and humble, remember that it feels like peace, joy, and rest. I bless you now with rest for your soul. Amen.

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Hope for the Holidays

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The holidays at the end of the year tend to be polarizing. You could find yourself at the North Pole, visiting Santa. Or, you could find yourself at the South pole, all alone.

If life has gone well for you throughout the year, then Christmas is the ultimate celebration with friends or family (or both!). It’s like having your favorite dessert with your favorite topping. It’s not essential, but it sure tastes good.

If life hasn’t been going well, December might be cause to emphasize how terribly lonely you feel. That could be like your car breaks down, and you have no place to go for Christmas. You might wonder, What else is going to go wrong?

Life can be cruel sometimes. You can make the extra effort to be nice or work hard to complete a project at work, but the reward doesn’t come. Maybe even just the opposite happens: you are rejected and betrayed by an important person in your life or you lose your job (or both!).

What next? Is there hope for you? Has God abandoned you? It probably feels like He has.

God is Aware of Life’s Ups and Downs

God is aware of all the times when life disappoints. He’s wired into our hearts such a desire for good things. So, of course, He expects you to feel disappointed when your expectations aren’t met. This doesn’t mean you should throw out your expectations.

Your desire for life to go smoothly and to be able to enjoy your days is essential.

Your ability to hold onto hope when life doesn’t go smoothly is equally essential.

Somehow God wants you to aim for the highest and best possible outcomes, accept all (short-term) setbacks, and continue in faith and hope. Click To Tweet

Giving up on God is the ultimate expression of hopelessness. Loneliness, boredom, and hopelessness are really just natural consequences of not seeing God’s reality. You’ve lost everything if you’ve lost sight of God’s reality.

God Hasn’t Forgotten You

God still loves you. His love hasn’t changed. You can rest in this fact. Isn’t that what we most want to know during difficult times? You’re not experiencing catastrophic news meant to permanently shut the way to all hope. God is still with you amidst the chaos.

Your chance is coming. How do I know this? God is good. To want to not be lonely is a good thing. It’s hard to feel hopeless and not also feel lonely. It’s equally hard to feel lonely and also not feel hopeless. But if this is true, then the opposite is equally true: if you’re connected to someone, it’s hard to not feel hopeful.

Knowing you are connected to someone on a regular basis is essential to emotional well-being.

Even when you are alone, you won’t feel so lonely if you’re feeling hopeful. Hope comes from faith in Jesus and what He promises.

This Christmas, focus on seeing God’s reality. Ask God to help you believe and you’ll have hope for the holidays. Your heart will be home for Christmas.

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Faith, Hope, and Love

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What is the difference between faith, hope, and love? Why would it matter to you? It matters because you need all three for a healthy spiritual life.

And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

1 Corinthians 13:13 NIV

So, love is greater, but faith and hope are important too.

Faith and Trust Fit Together

If you have faith, then you must be trusting in Jesus Christ. To trust in Jesus Christ must mean you have a vibrant faith.

But, faith comes before hope:

Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see.

Hebrews 11:1 NIV

You could hope for something, but lack the faith (the confidence) that it will come to pass. That kind of hope is essentially worthless (it isn’t biblical hope). You can hope it doesn’t snow tomorrow, but nobody is going to promise you that it won’t snow.

If Jesus never promised us anything, there would be no need for hope. Faith would be enough.

Hope and Future Events Fit Together

Hope is the excitement around an anticipated event. When you have faith in Jesus, you’re able to trust His promises. You’ll have hope that what He says will eventually come true.

For in this hope we were saved. Now hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for what he sees?

Romans 8:24 ESV

So, you trust a person and you hope in a promise. Through faith we have hope that carries us along to the finish line. What about love?

Love Makes Faith and Hope Possible

If Jesus wasn’t full of love, He wouldn’t have provided the way for us to trust or hope in Him (Ephesian 2:8-9).

Love is the greatest because it involves action with the greatest effort and risk. Love would sacrifice everything.

Anyone can hope. Many people believe in something. They trust and have faith. Few truly love.

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