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Matt Pavlik

escape a chained reality

Find God’s Beautiful Reality

August 31, 2019 by Matt Pavlik Leave a Comment

Reading time: 3 minutes

How much of your life do you spend in reality? How much do you spend in a fantasy world whether that is of your making or another’s creative fiction?

Taking a break from reality is healthy up to a point. But what starts as innocent can become harmful. Taking a break can eventually become escaping reality. Then what if you reach the point where you begin to prefer to escape more than you like to be present? You could then become chained (addicted) to a false reality that you find difficult to escape.

Don’t Deny Reality

We are only aware of a fraction of who we are at any given time. Sometimes this denial of who we are is normal and healthy. But at other times, we become stuck denying important information.

If you’re in denial, you could be:

  1. Believing you are better than you are (you are pridefully protecting your ego).
  2. Believing you are worse than you are (you are making a negative experience more important than it is).

Try to become more aware right now. Think through the past couple of weeks. What has been the focus of your thoughts? Is there anything resting just below the surface? What are you half-aware of? What could be buried deep? What is nagging at you in the back of your mind, but you haven’t admitted or verbalized it?

Denying the truth is usually not good. But you must escape what you can’t fully handle in the moment. On the other hand, denying something false is usually good. God wants us to die to (deny) sin and be alive to Him.

So you also must consider yourselves dead to sin and alive to God in Christ Jesus.

Romans 6:11 ESV

Focus on God’s Reality

Is there such a place as heaven on earth? How hard should Christians be trying to manufacture a utopia?

We can make the effort to embrace the reality of God’s truth. But this includes the truth that this life, in its present form, is passing away (1 Corinthians 7:31). We can make our lives somewhat better, but we might lose everything if we focus more on present reality over future reality. What is coming next is far greater than what we have today. Jesus said if we focus on keeping our (present) life we might lose our (future) life, but if we focus away from our present life, we will keep our future life (Matthew 16:25).

For to me to live is Christ, and to die is gain. If I am to live in the flesh, that means fruitful labor for me. Yet which I shall choose I cannot tell. I am hard pressed between the two. My desire is to depart and be with Christ, for that is far better. But to remain in the flesh is more necessary on your account.

Philippians 1:21-24

The only true reality is the one God says is real. You might lean into other less-than-true realities when the pain is too much and you think you have no other options. But as soon as you’re ready, you should run toward God and His reality.

In what ways are you in denial? Consider how aware you are of your emotions and memories. Put together these determine the worldview you carry around in your heart. Are you avoiding these significant experience by being stuck in a rut of unchanging routine? Ask God for the strength to endure the harshness of reality, but also for the spiritual insight to behold the beauty of His reality.

God is merciful; He allows and even provides for a healthy escape. He provides moments that transcend the difficulties of life (see 1 Corinthians 10:13). When God provides the opportunity for you to enjoy life, be sure to take full advantage.

Learn more about identity and reality.
Image by PublicDomainPictures from Pixabay
Last updated 2024/11/24

Filed Under: Identity, Self-Care, Spiritual Formation Tagged With: faith, fear, reality

Wisdom Sees The Lord As Awesome

Wisdom Sees The Lord As Awesome

August 23, 2019 by Matt Pavlik 7 Comments

Reading time: 4 minutes

How do you see the Lord? Wisdom enables you to respect God. But given that life can be so difficult, God might not seem worthy of respect.

Does the Bible contradict itself? How can a good God continue to allow pain and suffering? Why does God choose some people and seem to reject others?

Most Christians would agree the Bible is our source of truth. But how can there be so many different interpretations of the truth? Which one is right?

To interpret the Bible correctly requires keeping in mind two ideas. First: God authored it, so only He can correctly communicate His intentions. God’s Spirit within the believer guides the believer into truth. Second: Your presuppositions can make or break your interpretation. If a building’s foundation is faulty, the rest of it will be too.

I’m assuming you are a believer and want to know God’s opinion about the truth. So, I’m going to focus on the second idea: how to form a solid foundation. Because we read top to bottom, I will flip my analogy upside-down.

Instead of a building, I want you to imagine a pyramid. There’s only room for one block at the top. The next layer has a few more blocks, and the third layer has even more. To understand the Bible, you must know the one truth that is higher than all others. This truth helps interpret all the levels below it.

A hierarchy is needed to know what is most important. You have a pyramid of values that determines how you will interpret the Bible.

Wisdom says God Exists

Putting this truth at the top establishes your basic worldview. God created you. When you are trying to understand what the Bible has to say about your life, you first realize that God is real. See Hebrews 11:6.

Wisdom says God is Good

One level down you can establish that God is perfect. In all that God does, He is working for good. He can’t commit an evil act. This prevents you from questioning God’s motives. See Mark 10:18.

Wisdom says God is Love

Around the same level as good, we can say that God is love. He cares about you personally and wants an intimate connection. He wants to know you, and He wants you to know Him. See 1 John 4:8.

Wisdom says God is Higher

God always understands us, but we can’t always understand Him. See Isaiah 55:8-9 and Proverbs 3:5-6.

Wisdom says God is in Control

God is all-powerful. God has the power to change the outcome of history. When it unfolds the way it does, God is allowing it that way for His purposes. This allows us to trust God even when life is confusing and difficult. See Psalm 31:13-14.

You can make many plans,
    but the Lord’s purpose will prevail.

Proverbs 19:21 NLT

Wisdom says God Allows Suffering

God continues to allow evil to exist. God allows bad things to happen. God allows suffering to continue.

How can these statements about God help strengthen your doubt? You might not have a full answer to why God allows suffering. Indeed, when He knows the time is right, the world as we know it will be gone and we’ll be in heaven. Until then, it’s important that we don’t lose our way.

There is a reason I put suffering so far down. When you’re in pain and suffering, look up farther in the pyramid. God is in control. God’s ways are higher. God is love. God is good. God exists. These are true whether your life is going well or not so well. These are true whether someone else’s life is going well or not so well.

If you start doubting the top of the pyramid, where will that lead you? How would your life be different with “God doesn’t exist” at the top?

Next time you read something in the Bible that confuses you or causes doubt, refer to your hierarchy of truth. It should save you from having to rebuild a pyramid every time you encounter a difficult life event.

Occasionally, you might find your pyramid has a weak point that needs to be strengthened. For example, you might need to know God’s forgiveness, and therefore, “God is love” fits closer to the top. This isn’t to say that truth can change but only recognizes that your understanding of what belongs at the top can shift some as you grow.

Fear of the Lord is the foundation of wisdom.
    Knowledge of the Holy One results in good judgment.

Proverbs 9:10 NLT

Wisdom starts with (or is founded upon) fearing the Lord. Fear of the Lord is the top of the pyramid. God exists. He’s in control. He holds your very life. You live and breathe only because God wills it.

What struggles cause you to doubt? What helps you remain faithful (full of faith) despite circumstances?

Learn more about confidence in the Lord.
Image by lapping from Pixabay
Last updated May 28, 2023

Filed Under: Spiritual Formation, God's Kingdom Tagged With: faith, fear, interpretation, suffering, truth

Hope When All Seems Hopeless

August 18, 2019 by Matt Pavlik Leave a Comment

Reading time: 2 minutes

When you feel discouraged, where do you turn? Hoping in hope is empty. Positive thinking won’t last long unless it’s based upon the reality that comes from God. I want to hope in something real. That’s what truly inspired me when I first became a Christian.

When I became a Christian, my whole understanding of life crossed over from complete meaninglessness to an ordered plan. At times I lose the sense that the details of life are ordered. When bad things happen, life doesn’t make much sense. But this doesn’t change the ultimate truth that God is real.

When all seems hopeless, there is always still hope for a believer in Jesus Christ. You might have had the worst luck or just received the worst news. You might have nothing left, but if you’re breathing… If you’re alive, then you have a purpose for being here. If everything is failing, but you are alive, then God still has a purpose for you being here.

You can be experiencing nothing much happening that is meaningful, but still know that life has meaning and purpose.

You can despair of this life and the difficulties and pain it brings, yet burn inside because the flame of God’s hope will never go out.

When you hit bottom, you’re ready to give up hope in everything else. God’s message of hope shines all the brighter.

Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.

2 Corinthians 4:16-18

I encourage you to ponder what your life might look like if you hold onto God, and move in the direction that God is leaving open to you. Is God closing doors? That’s God pruning you, so you will grow in another direction.

God doesn’t want you to give up; He wants you to try something new – something you haven’t tried yet.

With God there are infinite possibilities, but only a finite number of closed doors. Share on X

What dream is in your heart? What other ways can you pursue your dream beyond closed doors? Leave me a comment or send me an email about your dream so I can pray over you and your dream.

Image by Free-Photos from Pixabay

Filed Under: Spiritual Formation, Boundaries, Identity Tagged With: faith, fear, purpose, suffering

Why Does God Allow Bad Things to Happen?

August 11, 2019 by Matt Pavlik 6 Comments

Reading time: 5 minutes

Can you trust God when bad things happen?

Why God allows evil is an important question. But a better question is: What attitude should I have when I encounter evil? I love Habakkuk’s attitude. Despite what is happening, he expresses an unwavering faith in God.

Though the fig tree should not blossom,
    nor fruit be on the vines,
the produce of the olive fail
    and the fields yield no food,
the flock be cut off from the fold
    and there be no herd in the stalls,
yet I will rejoice in the Lord;
    I will take joy in the God of my salvation.
God, the Lord, is my strength;
    he makes my feet like the deer’s;
    he makes me tread on my high places.

Habakkuk 3:17-19

There is a lot of disturbing happenings going on in our world right now. Following are my thoughts on how to hold onto faith when bad things happen.

Even for those of us not directly affected by the recent Dayton / El Paso / Gilroy shootings, we all may feel anxious. How can I cope with feeling like this is going to happen to me?

From a faith perspective, ultimately God is in control. There is little we can control (apart from having God’s help). Someone could play it completely safe by staying home, but then their house could catch fire. Difficult and even horrible events can and will happen. We cope by trusting in God’s long-term plan. A near-sighted look at a tragedy will bring anxiety and despair because in the short-term our lives are fragile.

What are the best strategies for coping? Should I turn off the news?

If someone is easily upset by the news and would become desperate then yes, they shouldn’t watch it until they can better put it into perspective. The chances of dying in a tragedy are minimal. Life is short. Do we want to spend it worrying about what might happen? If we do, this probably reveals that we place too much importance on what happens in this life.

Productive coping will move someone to positive action, not leave them trapped in anxiety or despair. Coping is always a temporary measure until the solution is available.

How can Christians make sense of senseless violence? Why would God let this happen? What comfort can you offer me?

To fully cope with evil requires a worldview shift. Jesus said to expect violence and difficulties. Even though it is heartbreaking, we shouldn’t be surprised. Evil exists. People can be easily influenced by evil. There is a reason to despair (without God). Life is difficult because everyone suffers to some degree and everyone dies in the end.

In the biggest picture, senseless violence is a wake-up call that life is short. Place your hope in God and the next life He has prepared for those who believe. Until someone reaches a saving faith in Jesus Christ, they are spiritually dead or perhaps I could say asleep. Without a wake up call, no one would seek God.

God allows evil to show the profound contrast between good and evil. In times of senseless violence, choosing goodness, choosing God should be easier. I don’t see a third option. The person who lives a cushy life unaffected by difficulty won’t see the real danger coming. A person dying of cancer needs to know their diagnosis. The comfort I can offer is that God says He will make everything right eventually. In the next life, we won’t have to deal with evil and suffering. But for now we need to realize, “the world is dying of a cancer.”

One step towards healing/coping is to try to find meaning. SandyHook parents advocate for gun control. Survivors may say “I want to be part of the solution to prevent/change what’s at the root of the problem that led to violence.” Will finding meaning like this help me heal?

Even though our ultimate hope must be in God and the next life, God leaves us here to govern the world. We should do that well with all goodness. We should do all we can to push back evil. But the evil we need to be concerned with first is spiritual not physical. People who participate in a mass killing must of course be stopped and they must face consequences for their actions. However, the ultimate problem is a spiritual one. Finding the maximum meaning in this life is still less than the least meaning you can find in the next life.

People need spiritual renewal, hope and truth more than they need gun control. To the degree people are well on the inside (mentally and spiritually), the chance of them aligning with an evil agenda is minimized. Gun control that takes guns out of the hands of people who are suicidal or homicidal is good. But if that’s all we do, we will only have a false sense of security. Evil will find another way as we learned with 911.

True security only comes by a genuine faith in Jesus Christ. Even though I’m a Christian, I still struggle at times with anxiety or depression, but it doesn’t balloon out of control because I know that God is good and He will make everything right one day soon.

I talk about the idea of good and evil and how knowing your true God-given identity is the antidote to anxiety and despair in my book, To Identity and Beyond.

Image by Foto-Rabe from Pixabay

Filed Under: Core Longings, Identity, Spiritual Formation Tagged With: coping, evil, faith, fear, good, violence

Play Is Essential To Being Your Best

Play Is Essential To Being Your Best

August 4, 2019 by Matt Pavlik 4 Comments

Reading time: 3 minutes

When you rake leaves in your yard, is it fun or work? Your answer probably depends on your purpose. Your goal might be to play in the leaves. Or, it might be to make your yard look presentable when you’d rather be doing something more fun.

Children will spend hours raking leaves when they see it as fun. But tell them it’s a chore they have to do, and they’ll spend hours moving slowly and complaining about the job.

What is Play?

Play is a time-out from reality in order to better understand reality. Share on X

In his classic book Homo Ludens, Johan Huizinga defined play as “a free activity standing quite consciously outside ‘ordinary’ life as being ‘not serious,’ but at the same time absorbing the player intensely and utterly. It is an activity connected with no material interest, and no profit can be gained by it. It proceeds within its own proper boundaries of time and space according to fixed rules and in an orderly manner.”

Play can be work you enjoy; if it becomes drudgery, it has become something else. Play is relaxing; if it becomes stressful, it has become something else. People choose to play; if it is forced, it has become something else. Play is a glimpse of heaven. If it involves sin (missing God’s ideal), it has become something else.

Play is Related to Purpose and Rest

Play is important because it allows you to connect with the reason God created you. Kids use their imagination to re-create (recreate, grow, build) their understanding of God, self, and life. Forgetting how to have fun is never a good thing. Perhaps the Sabbath is meant to be a time to have fun instead of working so hard.

If your life is all about work, you’ll see yourself as an object that others use. You lose your value. You believe what you want is irrelevant. With a worldview like this, you become only a shell of a person. You can become so focused on tasks that you no longer feel like a person.

One of my favorite things to do is install insulation in a hot attic. Just kidding! I’ve taken on this task a couple of times and it always triggers the thought, this must be what hell feels like. Isolation from people. Irritation from glass fibers. Extreme heat. Maybe insulating is better as a non-summer activity? I’d rather be raking leaves.

When work becomes the priority in life, you’ll lose touch with your true purpose and you’ll become depressed. That’s because you’re made for more than being a machine. Machines don’t have feelings; they tolerate meaningless repetition.

God made you to have fun. He made you to experience joy.

Different people will define “fun” differently. What is work to one, will be fun to another. There will even be different times when what was once work is play, or what was once play is work.

How Much Fun Are You (Having)?

Could you be experiencing depression or anxiety because you have a faulty view of life that emphasizes work over play? Maybe you didn’t become this way on purpose, but your life has changed slowly and now you’ve forgotten how to have fun.

Do a quick check of your current lifestyle.

How much of your life is work and how much is fun?
Has your “fun” turned into a chore?
When was the last time you let loose with an all-out belly laugh?
When was the last time you chose to be more extravagant than efficient?
What are you afraid will happen if you pursue more fun in your life?

Heaven is going to be like work that feels like play, not play that feels like work. Share on X

With the right motivation, your work will honor God, but God also taught His people to have times of celebration and rest. See Luke 15:23-24 and Psalm 118:24.

So this week, will you be intentional about truly playing? Set some time aside for this ultimate way to enter God’s rest. You can’t reach God’s purpose for your life without play.

Read about desire fulfillment.
Image by Annie Spratt from Pixabay
Last updated June 25, 2023

Filed Under: Boundaries, Identity, Spiritual Formation Tagged With: play, purpose, rest

Never Give Up

July 28, 2019 by Matt Pavlik 1 Comment

Reading time: 3 minutes

Have you ever been tempted to give up? Maybe you’ve encountered failure after failure or disappointment after disappointment. No matter what you do or how hard you try, your efforts don’t bring the results you hope for.

But guess what? Past results don’t predict future results with any certainty – not when God is involved. Abraham and Sarah were too old to have a child, but God made it happen according to His promise.

Moses led the Israelites out of Egypt but they didn’t reach the promised land for 40 years. God fulfilled His promise when Joshua took over after Moses passed away. Yet, consider that the Israelites were enslaved for 400 years prior to God starting the delivery process. That’s multiple generations of suffering. That’s plenty of time to give up and some of them did grumble and give up, but you don’t have to.

Giving up is pretty much the same as giving in to the enemy. When Christians are tired and discouraged we can easily stop fighting for what is good.

God is never too late. What hasn’t happened yet, isn’t yet required. God holds every decision in His control.

Are you questioning whether God will allow your dream to be fulfilled? If your dream is godly, then I have a better question for you. How will you pass the time until God ordains your dream to bear fruit? What is the least amount of fear you can live with while you wait? Are you under crushing fear because you doubt God knows how to run the universe (or your life).

When negative events come out of nowhere, it’s easy to anticipate more negatives. Why? Because no one likes surprise losses. If you expect something negative, then you have some semblance of control over it. But if a negative occurs unpredictably, you no longer feel safe. If a negative event happens randomly, what will prevent another one from happening again, and then again?

The problem with this line of thinking is it leaves God out of the equation completely. Just because God doesn’t prevent something bad the first time, doesn’t mean He will continue to let you suffer (1 Peter 5:10).

If you lose heart, you’ve lost everything. You can always recover, but to do so requires that you reignite your faith. You may not have realized your dream in your expected timeframe, but God has the power to complete the impossible. What is impossible for man, is yet possible for God.

What can we conclude then? God’s timing is more important than our timing. When we are believers, we know God cares for us, so we also know whatever happens, no matter how difficult, we can never lose a dream that God can’t find and restore.

Our lives are significant, so we must always work for, and ask for, good things. However, we must also be prepared to accept delays and setbacks. As we grow in faith, we grow in acceptance of what God provides. He provides the right amount – not too much and not too little.*

Your efforts count. Never give up. You can make a difference in other’s lives that has eternal significance. Don’t give up doing good.

And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up.

Galatians 6:9

No matter what happens, never forget that you and God are on the same team. God and you ultimately have the same goal. You perform good works that will advance God’s kingdom (Ephesians 2:10).

* If you would like to explore this idea further, read my book, To Identity and Beyond.
Image by Matthias Böckel from Pixabay

Filed Under: Identity, Core Longings, Spiritual Formation Tagged With: faith, fear, suffering

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