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Is Emotion an Obstacle or a Bridge?

Is Emotion an Obstacle or a Bridge?

March 23, 2019 by Matt Pavlik 3 Comments

Does emotion hinder or does it help? To many people, emotion is a pointless burden. It seems to linger purposelessly forever like a plastic bottle in a landfill.

Obstacles impede progress. You must expend more effort to move beyond the obstacles in your path. Some obstacles cannot be removed by your effort alone.

Bridges on the other hand smooth the journey. Someone already cleared the path which makes your end goal possible and maybe easier. Although, some bridges are challenging to cross. The journey is strenuous, not because of the path, but because of what must be left behind.

Whether the emotion is a positive experience for you or a negative one, depends on your perspective. Rocks in your pack can be considered an affliction, but they could also be a blessing in disguise–they can help you grow stronger so you can move obstacles out of your way. What seems like an obstacle one day, might eventually come to be seen as a benefit.

Emotion is Like an Obstacle

Emotion is never bad; it’s only the messenger. We’re not supposed to shoot the messenger. But what is a person to do when the message is overwhelmingly negative? When emotion is immobilizing, it acts like an obstacle to progress. But it really is only a pivot point loaded with potential.

A person can lean into the negative message and become all the more discouraged. A person can also block out the message. Rough, calloused hands and fingertips are a sign of hard work. Your body forms a protective layer while you get work done.

In an emotionally risky environment, it’s natural to develop an insulative layer to protect your heart. Some negative environments you can avoid completely. And you should. But in other environments, you can’t.

Everyone is going to have some emotional callousness. Adam and Eve became overly defensive after the fall. Over-protection is a tendency we all have to work at overcoming.

You have an automatic defense system that sometimes malfunctions.

Sometimes your defensive system protects you so well that you don’t even know what it’s protecting. I’m lost; I don’t know who I am. At other times, you’re surprisingly vulnerable. Why am I flooded with emotion now?

Emotion is Like a Bridge

Because God exists, hope exists. No circumstance can determine the final outcome of your life. Because of God, emotion, even discouragement, can be productive.

Everything has a purpose–even negative feelings. You can’t avoid all risky environments because there’s no heaven on earth. So the best anyone can do is commit to crossing the emotional bridge.

Emotion can always become a bridge to a better place. That bridge can look like an obstacle, at first glance. Maybe you aren’t ready to leave behind what is comfortable, whether that be numbness or negativity. Maybe you aren’t ready to find out who you are deep down.

Crossing the bridge means embarking on a journey to becoming alive.

The obstacle to a better future is refusing to leave behind the past. You can only escape past and present pain by crossing the bridge of emotion. As you feel what you’ve experienced, it will carry you forward.

God didn’t make us to journey alone. We need traveling companions to help ease the pain of seeking true living that God has planned for us. Avoiding future pain is wise… unless that pain is needed to make you into a better person. Or perhaps the better way to put that is becoming a better person always involved confronting your pain.

If you’d like to better understand how difficult emotions can be blessings, try the book Hind’s Feet on High Places by Hannah Hurnard.

Read about choosing healing instead of coping.
Image by Larisa Koshkina from Pixabay
Last Updated 2022/10/16

Filed Under: Emotional Honesty, God's Kingdom, Healing Tagged With: lost, numb, overwhelmed, panic, purpose, suffering

Your Purpose Is Always Packed With Potential

Your Purpose Is Always Packed With Potential

November 4, 2018 by Matt Pavlik 2 Comments

You are an individual with your own personality, interests, and abilities. You have an identity. Therefore, you automatically have a built-in purpose.

Your identity is inseparable from your purpose. If God intentionally created you as distinct from others, there must be a reason for your uniqueness. Why would God have made you if He didn’t want someone just like you?

Purpose Implies Many Other Profound Truths

While you can’t expect to discover your purpose overnight, you can be sure you have one at all times. If you always have a purpose, here is what also must be true at all times:

Your life is intentional.

God made you with intention. You are who you are because of His purpose. There are no coincidences. You aren’t like a random fish in a vast ocean that contains an uncountable number of fish. You aren’t an interchangeable part—one of many other identical fish. God knows you by your name.

What is the price of two sparrows—one copper coin? But not a single sparrow can fall to the ground without your Father knowing it. And the very hairs on your head are all numbered. So don’t be afraid; you are more valuable to God than a whole flock of sparrows.

Matthew 10:29-31 NLT

He knows you so completely that He placed you with your character, skills, and abilities in the time and place for you to live (Act 17:26).

You are a work of art.

You are a planned, deliberate, creative design. You’re not an accident. Your personality isn’t a mistake. You’re not lame or inferior. You’re not a reject. You’re not God’s failed experiment.

While we all need to admit that we have flaws, we have a real need to see ourselves apart from our flaws. One day (in the next life) you will no longer have these flaws. So they can’t be so significant today. The wrong you do today isn’t really a part of who you are.

Flaws can also be misrepresented. What might seem like a weakness–a personal defect–could actually be a misplaced strength. A fish is weak on dry land but strong in the water.

Just existing is meaningful.

What you feel, think, and do is significant. Even when seems like you are accomplishing nothing, you’re doing something. No matter how you feel about your deeds—whether they feel significant or not, in God’s eyes, they are important. To be alive means you are productive. God wired you to thrive by pursuing a relationship with Him.

You have significant work to do.

The more you understand life, the more you will know what to do. Not only can you make an important contribution in this life, but you were intentionally designed to do so.

You have a destiny to fulfill.

You will not only make a contribution, but you will be completing the work God planned for you when He made you.

For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.

Ephesians 2:10 NLT

You are wanted and needed.

All of this means that you, in all of your uniqueness, are needed. Without your participation, the outcome of any given relationship or task will play out in a different way than if you were involved. This doesn’t mean that God’s plans are limited by your refusal to participate. God will fulfill His purposes. Nothing can prevent or delay His will. But He chose you to participate. You are a masterpiece; you are one-of-a-kind.

Purpose Will Be Elusive Until You Know Who You Are

Having and understanding your identity provides numerous benefits. Can you imagine how knowing you have a purpose at all times helps you live each day? Now then, are you able to wake up excited about your day?

What’s your purpose? If knowing your purpose or even believing you have one is still difficult, then you first need to focus on learning who you are.

When you know your identity, you will know your purpose. When you are unsure of your purpose, then it is a signal to grow by digging deeper into understanding your identity. Because of your God-given identity, you have a purpose, and knowing this purpose allows you to claim your destiny.

Read more about purpose.
Image by René Schaubhut from Pixabay
Updated on August 22, 2022

Filed Under: Identity, Boundaries Tagged With: purpose

Hope When All Seems Hopeless

August 18, 2019 by Matt Pavlik Leave a Comment

When you feel discouraged, where do you turn? Hoping in hope is empty. Positive thinking won’t last long unless it’s based upon the reality that comes from God. I want to hope in something real. That’s what truly inspired me when I first became a Christian.

When I became a Christian, my whole understanding of life crossed over from complete meaninglessness to an ordered plan. At times I lose the sense that the details of life are ordered. When bad things happen, life doesn’t make much sense. But this doesn’t change the ultimate truth that God is real.

When all seems hopeless, there is always still hope for a believer in Jesus Christ. You might have had the worst luck or just received the worst news. You might have nothing left, but if you’re breathing… If you’re alive, then you have a purpose for being here. If everything is failing, but you are alive, then God still has a purpose for you being here.

You can be experiencing nothing much happening that is meaningful, but still know that life has meaning and purpose.

You can despair of this life and the difficulties and pain it brings, yet burn inside because the flame of God’s hope will never go out.

When you hit bottom, you’re ready to give up hope in everything else. God’s message of hope shines all the brighter.

Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.

2 Corinthians 4:16-18

I encourage you to ponder what your life might look like if you hold onto God, and move in the direction that God is leaving open to you. Is God closing doors? That’s God pruning you, so you will grow in another direction.

God doesn’t want you to give up; He wants you to try something new – something you haven’t tried yet.

With God there are infinite possibilities, but only a finite number of closed doors. Click To Tweet

What dream is in your heart? What other ways can you pursue your dream beyond closed doors? Leave me a comment or send me an email about your dream so I can pray over you and your dream.

Image by Free-Photos from Pixabay

Filed Under: Spiritual Formation, Boundaries, Identity Tagged With: faith, fear, purpose, suffering

No Guts No Glory

October 4, 2019 by Matt Pavlik Leave a Comment

Do you ever feel like just being you is too risky? The cost of authenticity might be rejection, but the payoff brings a bit of heaven down to earth.

Last week I wrote about the benefits of imagining what heaven will be like. I asked, “How would knowing the best possible interpretation impact the way you live today?” One person’s answer demonstrates the shift from despair to hope that I aimed for. He gave me permission to share his answer:

I enjoyed the post you wrote on Heaven. Thanks for posing the question. It gave me a chance to think about what the rest of my life could look like and how it could begin to move in that direction even now.

Knowing what heaven is like and who I am as God’s finished product would change the way I live out the rest of my days on earth.

During a recent checkup, my doctor said, “You look pretty good for someone who almost died a year ago.” Coming face-to-face with death has me thinking more about how I want to be remembered.

If I knew for sure what God plans for me in heaven, I could risk being that person more on earth no matter what others thought of me because I would know it pleased God. I should be doing that anyway, but there is always a struggle to know if I’m being the real me.

I want to:

  • be more unselfish, putting others’ needs before mine.
  • be more transparent about my feelings and not concerned about how that would look to others.
  • speak what is in my heart; I wouldn’t be unkind, but I would be free to disagree with others and risk being rejected and isolated from others.
  • be more vulnerable to love others and help them no matter what it cost me emotionally or materially.
  • be more humble, living out my purpose of bringing glory to God and doing things that have eternal value, not just what had meaning for my time on earth.

Acting in this way would bring more meaning to my remaining time here, leave an eternal mark, and make something in my life worth remembering to those I leave behind.

Imagining heaven’s best helps me trust God more (I can see why He led me through what He did) and value what He values. I want to see with a better perspective what is really important in this life and also what matters so little because it won’t be coming with me into heaven.

How about you? What will your life look like if you live with no regrets? No guts no glory. When you risk being who God made you to be, God is glorified. AND… when you share in Christ’s suffering today, you will also share in in glory (Romans 8:17).

Image by Cindy Lever from Pixabay

Filed Under: Identity, Emotional Honesty, God's Kingdom, Self-Image Tagged With: desire, purpose

How do I Realize My Identity?

August 24, 2018 by Matt Pavlik Leave a Comment

When life is a struggle, sometimes we wrestle with ourselves, sometimes with our circumstances, and sometimes we wrestle with God.

I wonder what challenge your facing that is causing you to want to realize your identity. Whatever the challenge is, I suggest you face it head-on. As you wrestle with it, you’ll learn more about who you are. Jacob wrestled with God and God ended up changing his name.

 And Jacob was left alone. And a man wrestled with him until the breaking of the day. When the man saw that he did not prevail against Jacob, he touched his hip socket, and Jacob’s hip was put out of joint as he wrestled with him. Then he said, “Let me go, for the day has broken.” But Jacob said, “I will not let you go unless you bless me.” And he said to him, “What is your name?” And he said, “Jacob.” Then he said, “Your name shall no longer be called Jacob, but Israel, for you have striven with God and with men, and have prevailed.” Then Jacob asked him, “Please tell me your name.” But he said, “Why is it that you ask my name?” And there he blessed him.

—Genesis 32:24-29

To understand your identity, you should also consider your worldview. What is your relationship to everything else besides you? Look at where you fit in comparison to everything else.

Considering your likes and dislikes is good. Considering what others see is also good. But there’s more. What brings deep satisfaction and meaning to you?

To realize your identity, enter into the following cycle:

  1. Define yourself as best as you can. Who are you?
  2. Live life. Experiment. Try something new.
  3. Define your worldview. Where are you?
  4. Define your purpose. Why are you here?
  5. Define your goals. What do you want to accomplish next?
  6. Focus on what is most meaningful to you for a while.
  7. Return to step 1 and repeat.

Filed Under: Identity, Boundaries Tagged With: goals, meaning, purpose, struggle, worldview

Reach Your Potential By Playing The Long Game

Reach Your Potential By Playing The Long Game

September 8, 2018 by Matt Pavlik 1 Comment

In chess, the pawn is the weakest piece. However, if you stop your understanding of the pawn there, you’ll miss that the pawn also has the most potential of all the pieces. If it reaches the other side of the board, it becomes more powerful because you can upgrade it to any piece you want.

God Wants You To Reach Your Potential

You might think you’re only a pawn, but God sees your full potential. When you are born again, you are upgraded to a new creation that permanently holds God’s Holy Spirit.

Even then, God has more in store for you.

Life isn’t a game. I’m not suggesting you play games with your life. But life is all about growth. Playing the long game means investing the effort to achieve maximum results. There isn’t a more fulfilling way to live even though most of the time this requires sacrificing short-term rewards.

Sacrifice Immediate Rewards To Reach Your Potential

Jesus gave up His earthly life to secure an everlasting victory over death. His life was short but long on results. He achieved such outstanding results because He followed the Father’s plan. He fulfilled His destiny.

You, too, have a clearly defined destiny. Have you invested the time to learn what it is? You can’t play the long game without it. You can expect to spend your whole life in preparation for the next moment of your life. God wants you to know your identity as a created masterpiece and walk in good works. The more you know your identity, the more you know your destiny.

For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.

—Ephesians 2:10

God made you for a specific purpose. Who you are is enough to fulfill your purpose. You have all you need to reach your potential. But you must seek and discover to reach your potential.

To accomplish this, you have to be sure you don’t become distracted away from God’s higher plans. As you become more, you’ll be able to accomplish more. But, if you don’t invest in growth, you delay reaching your potential. What are some examples of distraction traps?

  • Spending on material gain when you could be investing in spreading God’s kingdom.
  • Elevating entertainment above the hard work of spiritual and emotional growth.
  • Living an imbalanced life by working your job most of the time.

Care For Others To Reach Your Potential

The long-game player focuses on whatever it takes to cross the finish line. Sometimes this means prioritizing the immediate to achieve maximum impact. Jesus spent time healing people who eventually died. At first glance, this seems like a waste of time. He did it anyway because He cares. He showed us the Father’s heart.

Whatever you do while motivated by God’s love is never a waste of time. Focusing on the end-results shouldn’t prevent you from doing what is right in the moment. You just want to make sure that what you are about to do doesn’t sabotage your ability to finish the race.

Jesus never allowed any short-term gain to delay, diminish, or deter Him from God’s long-term plans. God’s long-term plans are non-negotiable, but He is flexible with immediate events. After all, it’s taking each step that moves you closer to the finish.

You can’t play the long game without faith. God always sees the end—the infinite future. Because you can’t see that far, you must trust His vision. You can, however, see far enough to take the next step.

More About Potential and Some More
Image by StockSnap from Pixabay

Filed Under: Boundaries, Identity Tagged With: purpose

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