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Trusting God After Buying Deception

Trusting God After Buying Deception

September 22, 2018 by Matt Pavlik Leave a Comment

Reading time: 4 minutes

How grace rebuilds your trust after a costly compromise. The road to recovery can be long, but it’s worth the effort.

Deception Erodes Trust

Recently, I missed a meeting—just a scheduling mistake. With time to spare, I wandered past a bookstore and felt the tug to step inside. I wasn’t looking for anything, just passing time. Ten minutes later, I walked out with three books I hadn’t planned to buy. They were on sale, and two were Christian titles. That makes it okay… right?

There was no pressure. No clever pitch. Just quiet curiosity. But later I realized: this is how deception often works.

If Satan were a salesman, he wouldn’t lead with blatant evil. He’d offer something good, cloaked in logic that feels reasonable. “Books are for learning. Surely God doesn’t want you to stay ignorant?”

The deceiver doesn’t shove. He suggests. He rebrands desire as wisdom, indulgence as growth. He offers reasons that feel noble while eroding trust. And it’s not really about books—it’s about how innocent decisions can quietly plant seeds of doubt.

Satan’s Whisper Erodes Trust

Satan doesn’t announce his lies—he murmurs them. He doesn’t need control—just enough permission to shift your gaze.

In Eden, he didn’t accuse—he suggested. He framed God as withholding, twisting truth just enough to create suspicion. That whisper hasn’t changed. It still echoes:

  • You deserve more.
  • God hasn’t been fair.
  • Why would a good God allow this?

Sometimes it hides behind self-doubt: I’m not enough. God must be disappointed.
Sometimes it rides on unhealed hunger: I need more success. More control. Just one more click, one more step to feel secure.

Every whisper shares one root: God is not perfectly good.

The All-or-Nothing Nature of Trust

God doesn’t ask us to trust Him halfway. Either He’s completely good, or He’s not trustworthy at all. A God with even a trace of darkness would no longer be safe. If He could change, lie, or withhold without purpose, then what hope remains?

The deceiver doesn’t need to unravel our theology in one stroke. He just has to convince us that God is slightly less than perfect—just enough for fear, suspicion, and control to creep in.

Once you entertain the idea that God may not be fully good, your foundations start to crumble. Doubt spreads. Security fades. You begin to search for goodness elsewhere—in performance, people, possessions.

This is why trusting God’s character is not abstract theology—it’s daily survival.

Those who know your name trust in you,
    for you, Lord, have never forsaken those who seek you.
    Psalm 9:10 NIV

Healing the Trust Deficit

If you’re struggling to believe that God is good, you may be experiencing a positive experience deficit—a soul-level hunger for reassurance that God hasn’t abandoned you. And that deficit can’t be ignored or stuffed down with more information. It needs healing.

Ask God to show you His goodness again—not in grand gestures, but in the small kindnesses you’re tempted to overlook. A timely word from a friend. A moment of peace in your day. A Scripture that pierces through your fog.

Even a glimpse of God’s goodness can rekindle your trust. Because if He’s good in one place, He must be good everywhere. His character is indivisible. And when that goodness begins to live in you—not just as doctrine, but as experience—it reshapes how you see pain, identity, and even failure.

But blessed is the one who trusts in the Lord,
    whose confidence is in him.
They will be like a tree planted by the water
    that sends out its roots by the stream.
It does not fear when heat comes;
    its leaves are always green.
It has no worries in a year of drought
    and never fails to bear fruit.
Jeremiah 17:7-8 NIV

Leaning into Trust

How would your self-image change if you believed—fully and without reservation—that God is perfectly good? What decisions would you make differently? What fears could you lay down?

The deceiver wants you to second-guess God’s heart. But the Spirit invites you to rest in it. You don’t have to earn God’s goodness. You just have to taste it. Let it anchor you. Let it silence the hiss that says, God is holding out on you. He isn’t. He never has.

Overflowing Trust

Trust isn’t just a shelter—it’s a spring. When you’ve tasted God’s goodness in weakness, your confidence shifts from striving to resting. And when trust stops being conditional—based on outcomes, feelings, or performance—it becomes generative. It bears fruit even in drought.

The same Spirit who whispered comfort when you were compromised is now anchoring you in clarity. What once felt fractured is now fertile. What once felt shameful is now sacred—a testimony of grace rebuilding what deception tried to erode. This is the paradox of redemption:

  • The compromise becomes a classroom.
  • The whisper becomes a warning bell.
  • The deficit becomes overflow.

God doesn’t just restore your trust—He refines it. And when you trust His character fully, fear loses its voice.

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.
Romans 15:13 NIV

Learn more about how to trust God.
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Last updated 20250803

Filed Under: Identity, Spiritual Formation Tagged With: God's goodness

Is God’s Love Uncontrolling?

Is God’s Love Uncontrolling?

July 20, 2025 by Matt Pavlik Leave a Comment

Reading time: 3 minutes

Recently, I read a blog post that thoughtfully explored the nature of God’s love, suggesting that divine love is “inherently uncontrolling.” The author, drawing from Thomas Oord’s theology, raised important questions about how we experience God’s power and whether control is compatible with love. While I appreciate the heart behind this reflection—especially the emphasis on God’s gentleness and compassion—I believe Scripture paints a fuller picture of a God whose love is not diminished by His sovereignty, but upheld by it.

God’s Sovereignty Is Not Domination

It’s true that God doesn’t override our humanity or force us into robotic obedience. But His control is not oppressive—it’s purposeful and redemptive. The Bible consistently reveals a God who actively governs all things according to His will. As Paul writes:

In him we have obtained an inheritance, having been predestined according to the purpose of him who works all things according to the counsel of his will.

Ephesians 1:11 ESV

God’s sovereignty is not passive. It’s the reason we can trust that history is moving toward His intended end. He doesn’t always act with immediate force, but nothing He wills ultimately fails.

Transformation, Not Coercion

Consider Saul’s dramatic conversion. One moment he was persecuting Christians; the next, he was proclaiming Christ. God didn’t violate Saul’s will—He revealed Himself so powerfully that Saul’s heart was changed. God gave him a new nature, one that desired Him. This is the essence of salvation: God initiates, transforms, and secures. Our response is awe and gratitude, not resistance.

If God’s will were contingent on human cooperation, salvation would be fragile. But Jesus assures us that those the Father gives Him will come to Him—and He will lose none (John 6, 10, 15). God’s love doesn’t compete with His control; it’s expressed through it.

Does 1 Corinthians 13 Deny Divine Control?

Oord’s interpretation of 1 Corinthians 13 suggests that love “does not force itself on others,” implying that God’s love must be non-controlling. But this reading stretches beyond the text. Paul’s description of love emphasizes humility and endurance—not a denial of divine authority.

Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful…

1 Corinthians 13:4–5 ESV

“Not insisting on its own way” speaks to selfishness, not sovereignty. God’s love is not self-serving, but that doesn’t mean He relinquishes control over creation, redemption, or judgment. In fact, His control is what ensures that love triumphs over evil.

Power That Secures Salvation

Paul declares:

For I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes…

Romans 1:16 ESV

God’s power is not a threat to love—it’s the very means by which salvation is accomplished. Without divine sovereignty, there would be no guarantee of redemption, no assurance of resurrection, no hope in suffering. But because God is both loving and in control, we can rest secure in Him.

📘 Secure in Christ

This theme is central to my upcoming book, Secure in Christ. In it, I explore how God’s sovereign love provides the foundation for lasting assurance. His attributes don’t compete—they harmonize. God would not be God if He were not in control. And because He is, we can trust that His love will never fail.

To suggest that divine love must be powerless to be pure is to misunderstand both power and purity. God’s love is not reckless or weak—it’s decisive, holy, and unfailing. Scripture does not invite us to imagine a God who merely hopes for our salvation, but to trust in a Savior who accomplishes it. Love isn’t the absence of power; it’s the redemptive use of it.

It’s like the hand of a skilled surgeon—precise, intentional, and filled with care. The scalpel may cut, but always toward healing. God’s sovereignty is not cold control; it is love that moves with clarity and purpose. Because He governs with goodness, we can rest not in probabilities but promises.

Learn more about the nature of God’s love.
Image created by Matt Pavlik using AI Copilot.

Filed Under: Spiritual Formation, Eternal Security

When Joy Feels Elusive And Faith Feels Thin

When Joy Feels Elusive And Faith Feels Thin

July 18, 2020 by Matt Pavlik Leave a Comment

Reading time: 3 minutes

Joy can be elusive, especially when you look in the wrong place.

If you’re hungry for strawberries, where do you get them? Strawberries don’t grow on apple trees. So, there’s little point in looking up a tree.

Where does joy come from? It’s a fruit of the Spirit.

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.

Galatians 5:22-23 NIV

The Gospel is the only true source of joy. Nothing inspires deeper joy than the Spirit revealing the sacrificial work of Jesus Christ in the hearts of the believer.

Joy is otherworldly. It’s spiritual. It can be difficult to grasp. It doesn’t always make sense when viewed from an isolated moment. It becomes elusive when you search for it in the narrow circumstances of your life, without the context of the Gospel.

But joy becomes logical when you look beyond the present moment. It flows from a truth greater than any fact of your current situation. Real joy is rooted in the reality of salvation. That’s the only way you can suffer and still be joyful at the same time.

Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.

James 1:2-3 NIV

Faith Makes Joy Possible

Faith sees beyond the physical to the spiritual reality. Joy is a fruit of the Spirit. And where the Spirit is, there is true freedom. Without the Spirit, joy would be impossible.

Joy results from trials because trials reveal the “too good to be true, even though it is true” reality of God’s kingdom. It is always possible because it’s based on the unchanging truth of God’s promises.

And he said to him, “Truly, I say to you, today you will be with me in Paradise.”

Luke 23:43 ESV

No matter what is happening to you today, if you are in Christ, then God has prepared a place for you in heaven. But He does not want you to rush there. He has you alive and present for a reason.

While you’re still here, God has a purpose for you. It’s okay to borrow joy from your heavenly future. In fact, that’s the only way to do it. The Spirit makes the heavenly reality known to you today.

Joy in the Middle of the Story

Joy isn’t just for the end of the story—it’s for the middle, too.

We often think joy will come after the resolution: when the diagnosis is reversed, the relationship is restored, the job is secured. But joy, as a fruit of the Spirit, grows in the soil of the present moment—even when that soil feels dry and cracked.

Joy doesn’t require the absence of sorrow. It coexists with it. It’s not a denial of pain but a defiant hope in the midst of it. That’s why Paul could write from prison about rejoicing always (Philippians 4:4). He wasn’t waiting for release to rejoice—he was already free in Christ.

Joy is not the reward for enduring the trial. It’s the companion that walks with you through it.

Enjoy!

Joy is not a reward for good behavior or a prize for spiritual maturity. It’s a gift of the Spirit, available to you now. You don’t have to manufacture it. You don’t have to fake it. You just have to receive it—by contemplating the wonderful Gospel message: Jesus saves people, not by their work, but by His work alone.

So go ahead—enjoy.
Not because life is easy, but because God is good.
Not because everything makes sense, but because His promises are true.
Not because you feel joyful, but because joy is yours in Christ.

Learn more about finding joy.
Photo by Stridsberg Carl form PxHere
Last updated 2025/07/06

Filed Under: God's Kingdom, Counseling, Identity, Spiritual Formation Tagged With: faith, fear, joy

Trust God When You Struggle To Understand Yourself

Trust God When You Struggle To Understand Yourself

June 15, 2025 by Matt Pavlik 1 Comment

Reading time: 5 minutes

Life’s unpredictability makes it challenging to trust God. Have you ever made a decision, only to wonder later why you chose that path? Have you ever felt uncertain about your emotions or actions, as if they were beyond your control? The truth is, no one fully understands themselves—not in the way God does. That’s why we must trust God to guide us through life’s uncertainties.

God created you for His purpose, and He knows everything about you, even the parts you haven’t discovered yet. When you trust God, you step into His greater plan, even when you don’t fully understand yourself. While you may struggle to make sense of your thoughts and choices, God’s wisdom remains unshaken. That is why trusting Him is far greater than trusting your own understanding.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
    and do not lean on your own understanding.
In all your ways acknowledge him,
    and he will make straight your paths.

Proverbs 3:5-6 ESV

One reason we often feel uncertain is that human awareness operates on different levels. There are at least four levels of awareness:

  1. Active – What you consciously focus on in the moment.
  2. Accessible – Memories and knowledge you can retrieve easily.
  3. Subconscious – Thoughts and experiences that exist below the surface but can be triggered.
  4. Unknown – Aspects of yourself that only God knows, including the future.

When making choices, you are never completely aware of why you decide as you do. That’s why you must trust God—His wisdom surpasses human understanding. But God sees everything—the past, the present, and the future—so trusting Him brings peace.

Trust God with your Active Awareness

Active awareness includes the thoughts and emotions you are consciously focusing on in the immediate moment. This is where your attention is directed. Some people shift focus quickly, while others can remain fixed on a task or idea for a long time.

But active awareness is limited—it only includes what you are thinking right now. When making decisions, it may feel like you have all the information, but there are deeper influences at work.

Trust God with your Accessible Awareness

Accessible awareness consists of thoughts, experiences, and memories that you can retrieve easily, even if they are years or decades old. You may not always be thinking about them, but they are available when needed.

This layer shapes decisions in ways you may not always notice. Perhaps a childhood lesson surfaces when faced with a moral dilemma, or a long-forgotten memory influences how you respond to a situation. Still, accessible awareness is incomplete—you don’t always recall everything when you need to.

Trust God with your Subconscious Awareness

Subconscious awareness is even deeper. It holds thoughts and experiences that are not readily available unless something triggers them.

Triggers can come in many forms:

  • A familiar scent reminds you of a forgotten moment from childhood.
  • A song stirs emotions from a past relationship.
  • A significant life event causes deeper reflection on who you are.

Dreams often process subconscious material, sometimes bringing buried thoughts to the surface. Trauma also remains buried when it is too overwhelming to manage in the moment.

You may not always realize how much your subconscious affects your choices, but God does. Even when buried thoughts shape your actions, you can trust God to lead you in the right direction. He understands what is hidden, shaping His guidance in ways far beyond human awareness.

Trust God with your Unknown Awareness

The unknown represents the future. You may not know how you will grow, change, or develop, but God does.

Imagine a young child. She has no idea what her life will look like in thirty years. Fast forward to adulthood—now, she sees who she has become. Yet even then, her future remains a mystery.

This is why faith is essential. While human awareness is limited, God’s understanding is complete.

Life as a Melody—Trusting the Divine Composer

We are like music boxes, hearing the melody as it plays but never fully knowing why certain notes appear, or what comes next. Yet God, the Divine Composer, is creating something beautiful.

1. The Melody of Life

Each experience in life is like a musical note, carefully arranged by God:

  • Joyful Notes – Moments of love, victory, and peace.
  • Somber Notes – Seasons of grief, difficulty, and reflection.
  • Chaotic Sections – Times when life feels unpredictable, like dissonant music waiting to resolve.

While a single note may seem insignificant, God is composing something extraordinary. Trust that His arrangement is greater than you can perceive.

2. God as the Composer

God is not improvising—He knows every note in advance.

  • He crafts the theme – Just as composers have a vision for their symphony, God has a plan for your life.
  • He chooses the instrument – Just as each instrument has a unique sound, each person has unique talents designed for His purpose.
  • He knows when to pause – Silence in music builds anticipation. When life seems still, God is preparing something ahead.

Even when your life feels uncertain, trust God—He is orchestrating a masterpiece.

3. Unexpected Notes in Life’s Song

Some notes in life feel harsh or unexpected. But God is using them for something greater:

  • Dissonance resolves into beauty – Just as difficult chords lead to harmony, trials lead to growth.
  • The music shifts – Life can suddenly change, like moving from a minor key to a major one. God knows when and how to bring renewal.
  • Hidden layers emerge – Just as melodies are sometimes unnoticed until the song unfolds, God’s plan often reveals itself later.

Even when life feels unpredictable, trust God—He is composing a song of meaning, beauty, and purpose.

Trust the One Who Sees the Whole Picture

Since human awareness is limited, relying solely on personal understanding leads to confusion. But God sees beyond every level of awareness.

You don’t have to understand everything about yourself—you only need to trust God and rest in His wisdom.

Find hope when life is difficult.
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Filed Under: Identity, Spiritual Formation Tagged With: awareness, subconscious

For A Better Relationship, Breathe

For A Better Relationship, Breathe

July 26, 2020 by Matt Pavlik 2 Comments

Reading time: 3 minutes

Do your relationships ever feel suffocating or isolating? If you’ve been a Christian for some time, you might be familiar with a common saying: “God doesn’t move; if you feel distant, then it’s not Him who’s changed.” In our spiritual journey, we can draw closer to God or allow distance through our decisions and distractions. When you sense that warmth fading, it is often a signal from within that prompts you to examine your priorities and habits.

Staying connected with God is not a passive experience. Just as in any meaningful relationship, maintaining closeness with the Lord requires intentionality—through consistent prayer, meditation on Scripture, and accountability with fellow believers. When neglect sets in, a slow retreat unfolds, not because God has moved away, but because our hearts have drifted into routine and distraction. Recognizing this pattern is the first step toward re-establishing that connection.

Deepening Our Relationship with God

In this light, consider the wisdom of Ecclesiastes 3:1:

There is a time for everything,
    and a season for every activity under the heavens

Ecclesiastes 3:1 NIV

This verse reminds us that both intimacy and periods of thoughtful reprieve are part of God’s plan. It calls us to honor the natural rhythm in our lives—balancing moments of devoted togetherness with intentional times for personal reflection and growth in our walk with the Lord.

Balancing Intimacy and Independence in Relationships

Similarly, the dynamics within our interpersonal relationships follow a rhythm that can be understood through the simple act of breathing. In marriage and close friendships, “breathing in” symbolizes times when you intentionally come together with your spouse to share, to pray, and to connect over heartfelt conversation that reinforces your mutual values. This period of closeness deepens intimacy by keeping your shared spiritual and emotional foundation strong.

On the other hand, “breathing out” does not mean discarding what is good. Instead, it means carving out time for fulfilling, independent pursuits—whether that’s personal study, ministry work, or hobbies that honor your Christian values. This purposeful personal time is essential; it strengthens your individuality and personal faith, equipping you to return to the relationship with renewed purpose and clarity.

Consider a couple experiencing daily tension due to a lack of balance. They have grown so accustomed to constant interaction that personal space is nearly non-existent, resulting in feelings of resentment and a loss of personal identity. By establishing designated periods for couple-time—marked by prayer, conversation, and planning for the future—and respecting intervals for individual reflection, they discovered that their love was not only sustained but enriched. Their experience serves as a powerful reminder that when both aspects are respected, both the marital bond and personal faith can thrive.

When your relationship with God begins to feel strained, consider this breathing rhythm as a guide. Reflect on whether you’re allowing sufficient space for both shared worship and personal devotion. Sometimes, creating clear boundaries for quiet reflection or personal study can lead to a more profound reconnection when joining others in fellowship.

Likewise, examine your relationship with your spouse. Engage in heartfelt conversation about balancing togetherness with personal time. Whether it’s setting aside moments for shared Bible study or arranging personal time to pursue individual callings, this balance strengthens you both as individuals and as a couple.

If you’re facing challenges and finding it hard to rediscover this balance on your own, remember that professional Christian counseling is available. My books and counseling services offer further guidance based on Scripture and real-life experience for anyone seeking to restore closeness and harmony in their relationships.

A thriving relationship isn’t about relentless togetherness or constant isolation—it’s about discerning and respecting the rhythm of your life. By following God’s timing as echoed in Ecclesiastes 3:1, you can learn the art of breathing: drawing close after a time of disconnection, and moving toward fulfilling individual pursuits after togetherness. May you find strength in both union and introspection, knowing that each season is perfectly placed in God’s plan.

Learn about community and loneliness.
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Last updated 20250601

Filed Under: Marriage, Core Longings

Only God Has Free Will

Only God Has Free Will

May 11, 2025 by Matt Pavlik Leave a Comment

Reading time: 4 minutes

Many people assume that human will is free, but in reality, it is deeply bound—either enslaved to sin or surrendered to righteousness. Only God’s free will is independent of any external influence. He is accountable to no one, dependent on nothing, and remains entirely sovereign over creation. Yet even His choices are shaped by His perfect nature. This is not a limitation. After all, He cannot improve because He is already flawless.

Humans Do Not Have Free Will

Don’t you know that when you offer yourselves to someone as obedient slaves, you are slaves of the one you obey—whether you are slaves to sin, which leads to death, or to obedience, which leads to righteousness?

Romans 6:16 NIV

In contrast to God’s free will, the human will operates within limits. Though people make decisions, their choices are always informed by their nature, which is either corrupted by sin or renewed through righteousness. People function exactly as God created them to function.

The Human Will Depends on God

Human beings contribute nothing to their creation. They do not sustain themselves—God continues to uphold their existence. Likewise, they do nothing to prepare themselves for new life in Christ, nor do they contribute to their spiritual rebirth. Even perseverance in faith is not a human effort but the work of the Holy Spirit. Yet while God initiates and sustains salvation, He does not act without us—He works in and through believers to produce spiritual fruit that accomplishes His plans.

If God’s sovereignty is compromised in even the smallest way, the entire theological framework collapses. Once human effort is inserted into the Gospel, it distorts the truth, reducing salvation to something earned rather than given. A sovereign God must remain fully in control, or else truth itself is weakened.

God’s Free Will Reveals His Ultimate Justice

When we focus on individual suffering, we might perceive injustice and randomness. Pain feels unnecessary, hardships seem unfair, and chaos appears dominant. However, when we zoom out and step back to view the grand picture, God’s justice becomes clearer.

By experience, it does not seem right that good people suffer while evil people prosper. The world appears unbalanced, rewarding corruption while punishing integrity. It isn’t easy to reconcile these realities with the idea of fairness.

Concerning grace, it does not seem right that God holds all people responsible for sin when they are powerless to overcome it on their own. If humanity is enslaved to sin, how can anyone be expected to live righteously without divine intervention? They cannot. Scripture teaches that salvation is purely a work of God, not something earned, but something freely given.

By glory, the tension between suffering and justice will finally be resolved. When God reveals His glory in eternity, everything will make sense. Believers’ brokenness will be fully redeemed, and true justice will be made known. The suffering of the righteous will not be wasted, and the prosperity of the wicked will be fleeting. In God’s presence, all things will be set right.

Living in Light of God’s Sovereign Free Will

This truth isn’t just theological—it affects how we approach daily decisions, big and small. If suffering appears unjust now, we trust that it serves a higher purpose in God’s plan. If human effort cannot produce salvation, we rest in the assurance that God alone secures it. If the world seems chaotic, we hold onto the certainty that justice will be fully revealed when God’s glory is known.

For example, rather than despairing when we witness evil flourishing, we remain steadfast in faith, knowing that no unrighteous act escapes God’s control. Rather than feeling helpless in our failures, we depend entirely on God’s committed love to calm our anxious hearts.

Human free will is impossible because only God’s will is free. Instead of autonomy, the pathway to peace is trust and dependence upon God. With this perspective, our lives are no longer defined by frustration or fear but by confident trust in the God who is fully sovereign, fully just, and fully faithful.

Imagine someone facing a major life decision—whether to take a job in another city or stay where they are. They weigh the pros and cons, feel anxious about the unknown, and struggle with the fear of making the wrong choice.

Instead of relying solely on logic or trying to control every outcome, they surrender the decision to God. They pray, asking Him to guide their steps. They seek wisdom in scripture, trust that He knows what is best, and wait for peace about the next step. Over time, they feel clarity, and even if the path is uncertain, they rest in the confidence that God is leading them where He wants them to be.

Surrendering acknowledges that human “free will” does not solve problems (because it is dependent on God). Even so, surrendering control doesn’t mean doing nothing—it means releasing the need to control what cannot be controlled and trusting God’s sovereignty instead.

Some of the ideas for this post came from Martin Luther’s work The Bondage of the Will.
Learn how to become free from shame.
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