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Is God’s Love Uncontrolling?

Is God’s Love Uncontrolling?

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Reading time: 3 minutes

Recently, I read a blog post that thoughtfully explored the nature of God’s love, suggesting that divine love is “inherently uncontrolling.” The author, drawing from Thomas Oord’s theology, raised important questions about how we experience God’s power and whether control is compatible with love. While I appreciate the heart behind this reflection—especially the emphasis on God’s gentleness and compassion—I believe Scripture paints a fuller picture of a God whose love is not diminished by His sovereignty, but upheld by it.

God’s Sovereignty Is Not Domination

It’s true that God doesn’t override our humanity or force us into robotic obedience. But His control is not oppressive—it’s purposeful and redemptive. The Bible consistently reveals a God who actively governs all things according to His will. As Paul writes:

In him we have obtained an inheritance, having been predestined according to the purpose of him who works all things according to the counsel of his will.

Ephesians 1:11 ESV

God’s sovereignty is not passive. It’s the reason we can trust that history is moving toward His intended end. He doesn’t always act with immediate force, but nothing He wills ultimately fails.

Transformation, Not Coercion

Consider Saul’s dramatic conversion. One moment he was persecuting Christians; the next, he was proclaiming Christ. God didn’t violate Saul’s will—He revealed Himself so powerfully that Saul’s heart was changed. God gave him a new nature, one that desired Him. This is the essence of salvation: God initiates, transforms, and secures. Our response is awe and gratitude, not resistance.

If God’s will were contingent on human cooperation, salvation would be fragile. But Jesus assures us that those the Father gives Him will come to Him—and He will lose none (John 6, 10, 15). God’s love doesn’t compete with His control; it’s expressed through it.

Does 1 Corinthians 13 Deny Divine Control?

Oord’s interpretation of 1 Corinthians 13 suggests that love “does not force itself on others,” implying that God’s love must be non-controlling. But this reading stretches beyond the text. Paul’s description of love emphasizes humility and endurance—not a denial of divine authority.

Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful…

1 Corinthians 13:4–5 ESV

“Not insisting on its own way” speaks to selfishness, not sovereignty. God’s love is not self-serving, but that doesn’t mean He relinquishes control over creation, redemption, or judgment. In fact, His control is what ensures that love triumphs over evil.

Power That Secures Salvation

Paul declares:

For I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes…

Romans 1:16 ESV

God’s power is not a threat to love—it’s the very means by which salvation is accomplished. Without divine sovereignty, there would be no guarantee of redemption, no assurance of resurrection, no hope in suffering. But because God is both loving and in control, we can rest secure in Him.

📘 Secure in Christ

This theme is central to my upcoming book, Secure in Christ. In it, I explore how God’s sovereign love provides the foundation for lasting assurance. His attributes don’t compete—they harmonize. God would not be God if He were not in control. And because He is, we can trust that His love will never fail.

To suggest that divine love must be powerless to be pure is to misunderstand both power and purity. God’s love is not reckless or weak—it’s decisive, holy, and unfailing. Scripture does not invite us to imagine a God who merely hopes for our salvation, but to trust in a Savior who accomplishes it. Love isn’t the absence of power; it’s the redemptive use of it.

It’s like the hand of a skilled surgeon—precise, intentional, and filled with care. The scalpel may cut, but always toward healing. God’s sovereignty is not cold control; it is love that moves with clarity and purpose. Because He governs with goodness, we can rest not in probabilities but promises.

Learn more about the nature of God’s love.
Image created by Matt Pavlik using AI Copilot.

Important Not Urgent: How Jesus Prioritizes

Important Not Urgent: How Jesus Prioritizes

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Reading time: 4 minutes

In a world where every notification and obligation rings important like a five-alarm fire, stress and burnout come not only from doing too much, but from doing the wrong things. That’s why the Urgent-Important Grid—also known as the Eisenhower Matrix—can be a powerful tool for Christians seeking peace, clarity, and purpose.

This simple four-quadrant system helps sort tasks based on urgency and importance, clarifying what truly needs our attention and what doesn’t. But more than productivity, the grid serves as a guide for spiritual boundaries and stewardship of time, helping us walk more wisely in a world that pulls us in every direction.

Quadrant 1: Urgent and Important – Do It Now

These are the tasks that keep life running—crises, deadlines, and responsibilities we can’t avoid. Work obligations, caring for children, attending to health issues—they’re urgent because delay carries real consequences. And they’re important because they serve foundational roles in our lives.

But living in this quadrant long-term is exhausting. It’s survival mode. When every day feels like triage, it’s a signal that we need to spend more time in Quadrant 2, cultivating the things that prevent emergencies before they arise.

Quadrant 2: Not Urgent and Important – Schedule It

This is the “abundant life” Jesus speaks about—planning, prayer, relationship-building, learning, and investing in long-term goals. Tasks in Q2 rarely demand our attention with urgency, yet they form the deep roots of spiritual, emotional, and relational health.

For believers, this quadrant is where we meditate on Scripture, disciple others, reflect, and grow. It’s the place of calling rather than coping. Spending time here leads to greater peace and clarity, and keeps us from drifting into stress-inducing chaos.

So far, this all sounds like serious work, but what is important but not urgent is also found in all recreation. What reduces stress? What is fun? Playful? Restful? Think of the Sabbath Rest.

Quadrant 3: Urgent and Not Important – Discern: Do or Decline

This is where confusion often creeps in. Tasks in Q3 feel urgent, but they aren’t truly aligned with your purpose. They’re often someone else’s priorities masquerading as emergencies—interruptions, emails, favors, even good things that aren’t your things.

The key here isn’t impulsive delegation but wise discernment. We must ask hard questions: Is this truly mine to handle? Am I responding out of guilt, fear, or a need to please? Will this steal time from something more meaningful?

Sometimes, we may decide to do the task quickly and move on. But often, we’re called to decline respectfully or direct the request elsewhere. This isn’t selfish—it’s stewardship.

Jesus models this beautifully. He didn’t meet every demand or heal every person. He was available but not constantly accessible. He knew when to engage, when to withdraw, and when to say “not now.” God has an intentional plan. He always sticks to His plan. Sometimes this means some potentially good tasks go undone, but only because something more important gets done.

Quadrant 3 is often where boundaries break down and stress multiplies. It’s the testing ground for our spiritual resolve—will we walk wisely or reactively?

That’s why the words of Ephesians 5:15–16 are especially relevant here: “Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil.” The apostle Paul calls us to intentional living—not just urgency-driven motion.

Quadrant 4: Not Urgent and Not Important – Eliminate or Limit

Scrolling, bingeing, endlessly clicking. This quadrant isn’t all bad, but it’s rarely fruitful. These are the habits that soothe but don’t satisfy.

For Christians, this is the realm of distraction. It’s not usually sinful rest, but it can become escapism without purpose. Q4 is a warning to reset—to choose solitude, rest, and presence over noise. What will really nourish your spirit? Find something healthier to do that fits in Q2.

Final Thoughts

Time management is not just tactical—it’s theological. Each quadrant reflects our values, boundaries, and convictions. The Urgent-Important Grid helps us live less reactively and more redemptively. In using it well, we step into a rhythm that reflects the life of Christ: focused, free, and deeply present.

Learn more about play and rest.
More details about the Eisenhower Matrix.
Image created by Matt Pavlik using Co-Pilot AI.