Matt Pavlik

Demonstrate Faith To Complete Your Training

October 23, 2021 by Matt Pavlik Leave a Comment

The fourth and final step to complete your training depends upon the lessons learned in the first three steps. The first three steps build faith so you can achieve victory over significant life challenges. This post describes step 4 of 4 of the transformative journey.

Depend on God Alone to Demonstrate Faith

From steps two and three, a person learns to tell the difference between friends and enemies. To complete your training you need to learn more than that. You must also come to realize that even friends can let you down. They can and will help, but they are limited just like you.

In Star Wars, Luke wants Han Solo to help but he presses forward even when Han plans to return home when the rebels need him most. Luke listens to Obi-Wan’s prompting to “use the force” instead of relying on his ship’s computer sensors. But Luke is the one who turns off his targeting computer.

Only God gives inward peace,
    and I depend on him.
God alone is the mighty rock
    that keeps me safe,
    and he is the fortress
    where I feel secure.
Psalm 62:5-6 CEV

When have you been tempted to wait for someone (other than God) to rescue you? Even when your friends help, keep in mind that God is the only one who can bring about a victory. Count on your friends, but never stop counting on God no matter what else happens.

Confront Goliath-sized Problems to Demonstrate Faith

What good would all the trouble of the first three steps be if you didn’t put it into practice? God prepares us for bigger problems than we can handle alone. Our active faith in Him paves the way for victory.

Luke takes on the death star, against incredible odds. He stays focused on his target while relying on fate. After his victory, Obi-Wan says, “Remember, the force will be with you always.”

David certainly had to rely only on God to be able to defeat Goliath. All of his other friends were too afraid to attack him. But David attacked Goliath in the name of the Lord. “In the name” is the same as saying “by the power.”

Today the Lord will help me defeat you. I’ll knock you down and cut off your head, and I’ll feed the bodies of the other Philistine soldiers to the birds and wild animals. Then the whole world will know that Israel has a real God. Everybody here will see that the Lord doesn’t need swords or spears to save his people. The Lord always wins his battles, and he will help us defeat you.
1 Samuel 17:46-47 CEV

Have you ever felt like God has abandoned you? Are you so discouraged that you have stopped trying to exercise your faith? You wouldn’t have a need for faith if you alone had the power to obtain the victory. Step out in faith to tackle problems bigger than yourself that you know God wants to resolve.

Mentor Others to Demonstrate Faith

As God has been faithful to you, share your faith with others. No matter how old you are, your faith will continue to grow as you put it into practice. You can testify about God at any age, but those who have walked with the Lord longer will have a stronger story to tell.

Now that I am old and gray,
do not abandon me, O God.
Let me proclaim your power to this new generation,
your mighty miracles to all who come after me.
Psalm 71:18 NLT

Take some time to remember all the ways God has been faithful to you. Don’t stop remembering until you can conclude that God has been faithful to you. This doesn’t mean you have never had trouble or heartache. It only means that you didn’t lose the sense of God’s goodness along the way.

A strong faith believes in God even when circumstances are challenging.

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Learn To Trust To Complete Your Training

October 17, 2021 by Matt Pavlik Leave a Comment

Trust is an essential skill for many aspects of life. It’s the foundation of every relationship you have. You need relationships to move forward in life. This post describes step 3 of 4 of the transformative journey.

Learn To Trust: Be Vulnerable in Relationships

You can’t accomplish anything apart from God. And, since God uses other people, you probably need them too. Trusting involves risk, but it also results in vulnerability which is required if you want to grow more emotionally healthy. It’s easy to trust when no suffering is involved. But God wants us to wait patiently for Him during our suffering.

The Lord’s people may suffer a lot,
but he will always bring them safely through.
Psalm 34:19 CEV

In Star Wars, when Luke attempts to rescue Princess Leia, he ends up trapped in a room-sized trash compactor. When a creature in the compactor strangles him and pulls him underwater, and yet again when the compactor starts shrinking, he must rely not only on his friends Han Solo and Princess Leia but also his droids C3PO and R2D2.

I waited patiently for the Lord;
he turned to me and heard my cry.
Psalm 40:1 NIV

When have you had no choice but to trust others when you’ve been at the bottom of your pit?

Learn To Trust: Replace Lies with Truth

In the midst of suffering, God would have us both accept the suffering and yet confront the lies that the suffering makes possible. When faced with the hopelessness of the moment, hope in God’s decisive, but future, victory is the only way to endure the pain.

Luke escapes the compactor only to see his mentor Obi-Wan struck down by Darth Vader. At that point, he lacks the understanding that something better is coming. But before Obi-Wan dies, he tells Vader, “You can’t win. If you strike me down I will become more powerful than you can imagine.” I imagine that’s what Jesus could have said to the devil.

Obi-Wan’s sacrifice is Luke’s gain because he can speak directly to Luke through the force. I know the force is fiction and impersonal, but it’s hard not to think of the parallels to the Holy Spirit after Jesus’s sacrifice. Obi-Wan guides Luke similarly to how the Holy Spirit guides Christians into truth.

He lifted me out of the slimy pit,
out of the mud and mire;
he set my feet on a rock
and gave me a firm place to stand.
Psalm 40:2 NIV

What lies are you believing about God or yourself that keep you in a pit? When have you experienced God removing sin, cleaning you, and blessing you with the truth so your footing is firm?

Learn To Trust: Accept a Positive Interpretation of Your Life

When you experience God the Holy Spirit within you, you have no choice but to see who you are from a positive perspective. You can rejoice that God’s sacrifice sets you free to contend with evil. Life can be hard, but victory is not only possible, it’s guaranteed.

After Luke feels the sting of Obi-Wan’s death, he resolves to continue to fight against evil. His confidence increases as he realizes he has the skills needed to contend with evil. “It’s not impossible,” Luke says as the rebels discuss the death star attack plan. Later he agrees with an old friend that, “they will never stop us.”

He put a new song in my mouth,
a hymn of praise to our God.
Many will see and fear the Lord
and put their trust in him.
Psalm 40:3 NIV

When have you had a goal so big that you have no choice but to trust God for a positive outcome?

God is worthy of trust no matter the degree of difficulty you face in this life. There are plenty of “false gods” to choose instead of God, but these will only keep you in a pit.

Blessed is the one
who trusts in the Lord,
who does not look to the proud,
to those who turn aside to false gods.
Psalm 40:4 NIV

What false gods do you need to put out of your life so you can accept the amazing plans God has for you?

Make A Commitment To Complete Your Training

October 9, 2021 by Matt Pavlik Leave a Comment

Reaching your pain threshold is enough to drive you into the recovery process. But you must make a commitment if you expect to be able to endure the pain long enough to heal emotionally. This post describes step 2 of 4 of the transformative journey.

Make A Commitment: Pursue the Help of a Counselor

When your life becomes unmanageable, when you experience a nervous breakdown, you become motivated to try a new approach to solving your problems. You seek out someone more experienced than you and willing to follow them.

In Star Wars, Luke recognizes Obi-Wan as a mentor of the force. Initially, Luke resists joining him, but he decides to take the next step forward after he sees that the empire killed his Aunt and Uncle.

Without counsel plans fail, but with many advisers they succeed.
Proverbs 15:22 ESV

Who in your life has more expertise in the areas in which you are struggling?

Make A Commitment: Discover Your Allies and Your Enemies

Your emotional pain will likely continue to intensify the more you strengthen your resolve to confront the enemy. The enemy’s goal is to escalate self-doubt. While your pain increases and you become more desperate, you will attract the people that will help you achieve your goals, as well as the people who will hinder your progress.

The intensifying pain forces you to make a decision one way or another. Will you commit to seeing your recovery through to its conclusion or will you turn back to your familiar ways of coping?

Luke learns that Obi-Wan, Han Solo, Chewbacca, and Princess Leia are his friends. He also experiences confirmation that the empire is his enemy. He could have decided to quit. But with encouragement and support, he commits to finishing what he started.

Suppose one of you wants to build a tower. What is the first thing you will do? Won’t you sit down and figure out how much it will cost and if you have enough money to pay for it? Otherwise, you will start building the tower, but not be able to finish. Then everyone who sees what is happening will laugh at you. They will say, “You started building, but could not finish the job.”
Luke 14:28-30 CEV

Are you willing to make a commitment to your recovery no matter what it costs you?

Make A Commitment: Examine the Origin of Your Problems and Distress

Moving forward in life often requires first looking backward to where you have been. This usually stirs up more pain as you look at your defects without any filters or blinders. There is no room for denial if you sincerely desire recovery.

Luke and his friends face overwhelming discouragement when they realize the empire has the power to destroy whole planets. They lose Alderaan, a peaceful planet. When they become trapped at the death star, they realize they can no longer turn back. They must overcome their problems and find a way forward.

“Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.
Matthew 7:3-5 NIV

Are you willing to acknowledge that you have serious problems to overcome? What self-doubts only seem to complicate your path to recovery? Can you endure whatever pain is necessary in order to realize a victory? Are you willing to look beyond friends and family to God for help?

Step 1 of the Transformative Journey.
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Overcome Resistance To Complete Your Training

October 2, 2021 by Matt Pavlik Leave a Comment

In order to complete a transformative journey, you first need to overcome your resistance to asking for help. This post describes step 1 of 4 of the transformative journey.

Often, life must become unmanageable or unbearable in some way before a person will be willing to seek help. There is a saying, “Only when the pain of remaining the same is worse than the pain of changing, will someone make the effort to change.”

You can let your pain build until it reaches such a critical level that you suffer a catastrophic breakdown. If you want to avoid this and move forward in your life, don’t make the following three mistakes.

Mistake #1: Fail to Overcome Resistance by Ignoring Problems

When a person is in denial they will attempt to cope with their problems so they can remain self-sufficient. Coping attempts to minimize the pain instead of eliminate the pain. Most people think of a problem as a negative event, but a lack of a positive event can also be a problem.

In Star Wars, Luke’s problem was more than the fact that he wasn’t happy as a farmer. He also wasn’t happy because he wasn’t able to pursue using his gifts for an even greater good. Helping his aunt and uncle was good, but helping to destroy the death star was far better.

There is a path before each person that seems right,
but it ends in death.
Proverbs 14:12 NLT

Are you on a path that seems good, but it is really leading you nowhere?

Mistake #2: Fail to Overcome Resistance by Clinging to Selfish Goals

When a person believes lies (such as “I’m worthless”), they lack the insight to look beyond their own circumstances. A person who clings to their selfish goals will fail to overcome problems and will experience painful loss.

Luke wants to fight the empire but he can’t see past his obligation to help his uncle. He does what seems right until fate brings serious trouble to his doorstep.

A prudent person foresees danger and takes precautions.
The simpleton goes blindly on and suffers the consequences.
Proverbs 22:3 NLT

Are you pressing ahead just because you want to or because it seems to be the safest route, despite some sense of looming consequences?

Mistake #3: Fail to Overcome Resistance by Refusing Help

The foolish person will refuse help even while they are suffering. Fear can stop many a dream from becoming reality.

Luke knows the rebels need help defeating the empire. Obi-Wan asks Luke to join him and offers to train him. Luke isn’t ready yet to leave home. He uses the excuse that he can’t get involved because he has work to do.

Fools think they know what is best,
but a sensible person listens to advice.
Proverbs 12:15 CEV

But when he finds that the empire is looking for his droids, he realizes that his aunt and uncle are in danger. Only when he is faced with their death does he have nothing left to prevent him from accepting Obi-Wan’s offer.

This logic might look like I’m saying that a young adult should always put their own ambitions ahead of their parent’s counsel. There might be more times that it is prudent to follow your parents. But in this case, the parents are the ones holding their child back from what is better–meaning what is better for God’s kingdom.

If you love your father or mother or even your sons and daughters more than me, you are not fit to be my disciples.
Matthew 10:37 CEV

So then, consider if there is anything you are refusing to do that would benefit God’s kingdom more than what you are already doing. What help do you need to overcome your resistance and make it happen? Who has already been offering their help? Ask God for wisdom and understanding so you can see your best path forward without serious consequences, if possible.

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Complete Your Training To Resist Evil

September 25, 2021 by Matt Pavlik 4 Comments

In Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back, Yoda challenges Luke Skywalker, “you must complete the training.” Yoda knew that Luke wasn’t ready yet to face his ultimate trial in a fight against Darth Vader.

How are you doing in your battle against the evil spiritual forces (Ephesians 6:12)? To reach a place of confidence in overcoming life problems, you must complete your training.

God’s school for persevering and winning against evil is called “life.” To complete the transformative journey, you must pass through four steps.

Step 1 Training: Overcome Resistance

Luke works for his Aunt and Uncle but isn’t happy as a farmer. He feels duty-bound to help them so he refuses to leave them. His hope to join the academy remains an unfulfilled dream. He is out of place. He isn’t pursuing his calling.

What is blocking you from attaining your dreams? In what ways are you resisting God’s call to adventure in your life? Step one’s purpose is to increase your level of frustration with your current life so much that you are willing to risk making a change. It is characterized by:

Pride that covers the pain of your life.
Believing lies such as “what others want for me is more important than what I want or what God wants for me.”
Resisting God’s call to spiritual growth.
Attempting to cope to remain self-sufficient.

Too much pride will destroy you.
Proverbs 16:18 CEV

By the time you finish step one, you are ready to seek the help of a counselor.

Step 2 Training: Commit To Recovery

Luke meets his mentor, Obi-Wan, and agrees to go with him to Alderaan. He learns he has other allies (Han, Chewbacca, Princess Leia) as well as enemies (Darth Vader and the empire). But he and his friends face a huge setback when Alderaan is destroyed.

What setbacks have brought further discouragement into your life, just when you decided to get help? Instead of turning back to your old ways, commit to your emotional recovery. Step two’s purpose is to solidify your reason why you want to pursue change. It is characterized by:

Being humbled enough to be willing to seek help.
Being willing to consider how the truth applies to your life.
Accepting God as good–that He has a plan worth following.
Acknowledging your problems and dysfunctional behaviors.

Too much pride can put you to shame.
It’s wiser to be humble.
Proverbs 11:2 CEV

By the time you finish step two, you have uncovered so much pain that you have no choice but to rely on God and other allies.

Step 3 Training: Learn To Trust

Luke fights his way out of the death star with Princess Leia but loses Obi-Wan. He struggles for his freedom only to experience greater suffering with the loss of his mentor.

I see Obi-Wan’s sacrifice and pronouncement that he will become even more powerful as similar to Christ being crucified and becoming more powerful as someone who has defeated death.

What painful memories continue to hold you back from pursuing your dreams? Instead of running from challenges, face them and be transformed by them. Find out what is most important to you. Step three’s purpose is to shift your focus onto how powerful God is and how positive your life is. It is characterized by:

Being vulnerable so you can receive the emotional healing you need.
Confronting the lies you believe with the truth so can freely move forward in life.
Accepting suffering as unavoidable at times and even beneficial.
Realizing that God is worthy of your trust.

The Lord’s people may suffer a lot,
but he will always bring them safely through.
Psalm 34:19 CEV

Even David went through years of training while defending his sheep from bears and other beasts (1 Samuel 17:34-37). By the time you finish step three, your training has prepared you to face the Goliath-sized problems.

Step 4 Training: Walk By Faith

Luke joins the rebels, trusts his mentor’s guidance, and destroys the death star. He is no longer self-sufficient. He is trusting in a power greater than himself. He becomes a hero that can inspire others.

What Goliath-sized problem is looming large over your life? How has God proven Himself faithful to you? Look for the opportunities to prove your training has accomplished its purpose. Step four’s purpose is to test your faith as you fulfill your God-planned destiny. It is characterized by:

Confidence in your ability to face problems with God’s help.
Embracing the truth to overcome doubts and other spiritual attacks.
Resisting evil by not giving it any room to thrive.
Faithful dependence on God for strength.

God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.
Therefore we will not fear.
Psalm 46:1-2 NIV

By the time you finish step four, your journey is complete. You are ready to help others if they want help with their struggles. You can also identify new problems and start the journey again for yourself. Or, maybe you are like Luke and didn’t finish your training the first time around. That’s okay. With God, it’s never too late to start on a journey of transformation. Future posts will cover each of the four steps in greater detail.

Sometimes a mentor can be a person like a counselor. But a mentor can also be a process like the ones in any of my books. Try either of those if you feel unhappy with where you are in life and want some help to complete your training so you can overcome the big problem in your life.

Learn more about freedom as you experience positive change.
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Good Enough Is Perfect

September 18, 2021 by Matt Pavlik Leave a Comment

When is enough, enough?

A project does not need to be 100% complete or even 90% to earn the title “good enough.” Good enough happens around 80%–the point of diminishing returns where additional effort is usually not worth it.

In a world where you can’t accomplish everything you want to, good enough is perfect.

An Optimal Return Is Good Enough

Imagine your friend asking you to sit and talk and with her. She will probably be pleased even if you do nothing else. But what will happen if you talk, bring her an expensive gift, and neglect to pay your electric bill? At best you have a happy friend and no power at home. If your friend finds out you neglected your responsibilities to give her something she didn’t want or need, your relationship will likely become awkward. A happy, giftless friend is better than having your electricity shut off and your friend no happier.

Maybe though, you will feel happier giving a gift than paying your bill? While that is possible, it doesn’t seem wise. If that sounds appealing, mostly like you are self-deceived. Consider exploring your motivation for the gift. Are you avoiding something negative (feeling guilty or inadequate) or trying to force something positive (make your friend indebted to you)? You might be happy immediately, but you won’t be happy when the food in your refrigerator spoils or you have no hot water.

Two good enough outcomes are better than one great and one poor outcome.

A Fulfilled Priority Is Good Enough

You have four hours to clean your home and visit with your friend. You could tell your friend you are busy and spend all four hours cleaning. You could skip cleaning and spend all your time with your friend. But maybe cleaning for two hours will clean 80% of the mess. Then you have two hours to spend with your friend.

You can accomplish more if you can prioritize and accept good enough.

You Are Good Enough

You are better off with fewer possessions or worldly accomplishments if it means you are placing your trust in God even more. Allow God to motivate you instead of feelings of guilt or inadaquacy. Choose peace over anxiety, enjoyment over striving.

Trust in the Lord and do good;
dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture.
Take delight in the Lord,
and he will give you the desires of your heart.
Psalm 37:3-4 NIV

Better Than Good Enough Is Costly

Going beyond good enough is an expression of our longing for perfection. God made us to desire good things. When we experience negatives, we can attempt to reclaim perfection, but it is costly.

Appearing generous to your friends or having a spotless home can feel amazing at the moment. But think about this: what is the opportunity cost? What are you giving up in order to briefly have something exactly the way you want it? Fulfilling this desire for perfection is not necessary to be content.

We have a “profit” that is greater than theirs—our holy awe of God! To have merely our necessities is to have enough. Isn’t it true that our hands were empty when we came into the world, and when we leave this world our hands will be empty again? Because of this, food and clothing is enough to make us content. But those who crave the wealth of this world slip into spiritual snares. They become trapped by the troubles that come through their foolish and harmful desires, driven by greed and drowning in their own sinful pleasures. And they take others down with them into their corruption and eventual destruction.
1 Timothy 6:6–9 TPT

Good enough gets the job done and leaves energy for many other activities that matter to you. Where have you been unnecessarily wasteful in your life? How can you aim for less but end up with more? Look for inefficiencies in your motivations. You don’t need to exhaust yourself chasing after empty promises. What can you accomplish that is important to you and to God if you could only accept good enough in other areas of your life?

More on Priorities.
More on contentment.
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