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Heart Attitude

Character, Confidence, and Commitment

June 7, 2020 by Matt Pavlik Leave a Comment

Taking a look at how you spend your time will reveal your commitments. But there is even more you can find if you look deeper. You can consider how you feel about what you find, which can vary widely from pride to fear.

Even more interesting than your feelings is simply, why? Why are you focused on certain things over others? Your commitment reveals your values but your values reveal your deepest longings, the motivations of your heart.

For your heart will always pursue what you value as your treasure.

Matthew 6:21 TPT

You’ve probably heard the saying, “if you don’t know where you are going, any road will take you there.” If you’re not aware of your heart motives, you likely frequently feel lost and confused. Some of life is certainly about making discoveries about who you are. But the more you know who you are, the more responsibility you have to act on your findings.

Be Before Do

God is working to bring you to completion. He created you and He’s working to consummate His work. To do this, He builds your character, which builds your confidence. Understanding who you are is a prerequisite to accomplishing His pure plan for your life.

God is the one who began this good work in you, and I am certain that he won’t stop before it is complete on the day that Christ Jesus returns.

Philippians 1:6 CEV

The more you know who you are, the more you can make a true commitment to accomplishing a great work for God.

Commitment drives spiritual progress. When you are locked onto a target and committed to seeing it through to the end, that’s when you maximize your potential. Maximum potential leads to maximum results (eventually). Whatever you commit yourself to is the exact area in which you will increase, grow, and achieve.

Don’t be misled—you cannot mock the justice of God. You will always harvest what you plant.

Galatians 6:7 NLT

God sending Jesus in human form to sacrifice Himself for our benefit is the ultimate expression of commitment. God proved He is willing to play by the same rules He’s given us. He didn’t take a “short-cut” path to victory. He proved He can walk the talk. He’s better than any of us and therefore makes the perfect example.

What things in life matter most to you? What are you truly committed to? If you don’t like what you discover, if you aren’t committed to the right things, then as you gain a greater understanding of who you are, rededicate your efforts to what matters most.

How are you feeling right now? The purpose of my message isn’t to stir up feelings of inadequacy because you aren’t doing enough for God. I want you to see the power of commitment. I want you to see the strength and peace that comes when you stay focused on the truth. You are important to God.

The scenic route isn’t often the easiest route, but it is the most beautiful and it will be the one that will get you to where God wants you to be.

Ask God to build your character, then your confidence, and then be prepared to make a commitment to advancing God’s plans.

Image by Free-Photos from Pixabay

Filed Under: Core Longings, Desire, Heart Attitude, Longing for God

Have Mercy On Me

Lord Jesus Have Mercy On Me

May 11, 2019 by Matt Pavlik 2 Comments

When I get stressed I sometimes pray the Jesus Prayer to help me focus on God more than my concerns: Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me (some people add, a sinner).

I first heard about the Jesus Prayer through a friend who uses it for his personal meditations. According to Wikipedia, it first came into use around the 5th century BC and is based upon three separate scriptures. The prayer definitely brings to mind the Parable of the Pharisee and the Tax collector in Luke 18:

But the tax collector, standing far off, would not even lift up his eyes to heaven, but beat his breast, saying, ‘God, be merciful to me, a sinner!’

Luke 18:13 ESV

The parable focuses on dependence upon God. It’s a humble plea for forgiveness. The prayer’s references to Jesus and Son of God emphasize God’s strengths amidst our weakness.

Because I know Jesus saved me from my sin already, I don’t repeat this prayer to secure my salvation. God hears all our prayers the first time. Repeating the prayer helps me focus on God’s presence in the moment of my concern.

I can struggle with how to best use my time while I’m still on earth. Am I focusing on what matters most? Will I have enough time to accomplish my goals? I realize God knows what is best; where my goals differ from His, His goals are more important. But this knowledge alone doesn’t remove all of my stress.

The prayer helps me focus on surrendering my life into Jesus’s hands. Praying this way reminds me that He is in control. The more I’m able to do this, the more relaxed I become.

Would you like to strengthen your connection with God? Connecting with God can help put your worries to rest. Repeating the Jesus Prayer can create a unique focus. The main goal is not to see all your wishes come true. Instead, the focused prayer, when used the right way, becomes worship. Whenever you worship God, you are automatically more relaxed.

When you repeat the phrase multiple times (sincerely and pausing in between each time) it’s impossible to not come away with a sense of Jesus’s position of power and your position of vulnerability. The moment this happens, you can release your burdens to the One who has all things under control.

Alternate Uses

You can customize the Jesus Prayer according to your immediate need. I recommend you start with the original phrase and then consider various changes to move deeper into prayer. When you are ready for something different, try emphasizing words or shortening the prayer. Eventually you might try substituting different words.

Emphasize Key Words

Focus on one or two words at a time. For example, if you emphasize Lord, you can begin to examine how Jesus being Lord influences how you feel about your concerns.

  • Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me.
  • Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me.
  • Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me.
  • Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me.

Focusing on the name Jesus Christ allows for more intimacy. You are calling the God of the universe by His personal name. When you experience God’s care for you, that’s personal.

Son of God emphasizes that Jesus comes from God and is God. But it also alludes to Jesus being the son of man, which emphasizes that Jesus is our human priest who is perfect and can sympathize with our weaknesses.

Emphasizing mercy is also helpful when you want to acknowledge and confess your sin. “Have mercy on me” is an intimate plea to experience God’s love and forgiveness.

Remove Key Words

Next, try shortening the phrase to discover different meanings. Each of the following has a different feel to them than the longer version.

  • Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy.
  • Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God.
  • Lord Jesus Christ.
  • Lord Jesus.
  • Lord.
  • Lord have mercy.
  • Son of God have mercy.

Substitute Key Words

Swap out a word to create your own meaning. For example, instead of “have mercy on me”, you could say, “strengthen my spirit.”

  • Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, grant me wisdom.
  • Lord Jesus Christ, your will be done in my life.
  • Lord Jesus Christ, my savior, have mercy on me.
  • Jesus, be near to me and save me from my troubles.
  • Jesus, I surrender all of me.
  • Jesus, forgive me for all of my sins.
  • Lord Jesus, have your way with me.

You can’t go wrong by focusing on powerful truths about who God is. In case you are wondering, repeating specific words doesn’t grant you any special or magical powers. But, there is power in prayer and in the truth of the scriptures.

You can trust a powerful God who also cares enough to relate to you in your weakness. The brevity of the prayers allows you to focus on the spiritual connection so you can relax your heart and mind, instead of filling your mind with many words and many worries.

Speaking of which, here is another type of prayer from me to you:

The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make his face shine on you and be gracious to you; the Lord turn his face toward you and give you peace.

Numbers 6:24-26 NIV

Photo by Ben White on Unsplash

Filed Under: Heart Attitude, Eternal Security, Forgiveness, Theology Tagged With: prayer, stress, worry

Remove the Roadblock to Security

January 26, 2019 by Matt Pavlik 1 Comment

Without a standard to keep people honest, they might get the wrong idea: You can sin all you want and it doesn’t matter. They advocate that it is possible to lose salvation. The possibility of losing salvation becomes the incentive to keep us from perpetual sin. They would say that rules and consequences keep a person honest.

Some people panic when they have nothing to do. They feel their life is pointless if they aren’t carrying their own weight. They require having a fear of failure hanging over their heads because it drives them forward. They need to earn their passage in life. They resist accepting any gift.

The need for the fear of failure is really avoiding the fear of trusting someone else for the security of your life.

Other people flee the demands of obedience. They want freedom on their own terms. They want God’s provision but not God. They quickly receive any gift but lack respect to the giver.

The need to have resources stockpiled with no strings attached is really avoiding the fear of trusting someone else for the security of your life.

Both kinds of people seek control over their own life. Both want independence from neediness. The responsible person tries to earn their own way by being good. The irresponsible person tries to secure their freedom through any means necessary (often by being bad).

Being responsible for your own load is a mark of maturity. The young son in the story of the prodigal son (Luke 15) learned this lesson well when he was willing to work as a hired hand for his father. He understood he had taken advantage of his father and wanted to repay his father. Fortunately for him (and you and I), his father confirmed his unconditional love for the younger son.

The older son had the responsibility (“I’ve never disobeyed you”) but he lacked the humility to receive the father’s invitation. The older son wanted to continue to rely on self-effort. The younger son, when he left his father, wanted to rely on self-indulgence. When the resources ran out, he switched to self-effort (“Make me your hired hand”), but quickly accepted his father’s correction; he accepted the ring of sonship and the invitation to the feast.

Both self-indulgence and self-righteousness attempt to provide for self and avoid dependence upon God. So long as you’re depending upon God’s righteousness, you can be sure of your salvation. We can see that eternal security depends on the faith, trust, and hope you place in God. Those who worry about losing their salvation are stuck in a moment of time. They can feel no hope because they are focused on fear rather than on God.

Years ago I went repelling for the first time. Somehow I intuitively understood that to descend to the bottom, I had to lean all the way out from the edge of the cliff. Without a rope and a secure anchor, this would result in a much faster (and deadly) descent. But trusting in the anchor and leaning all the way out made for a pleasant descent.

The same is true for your life as a Christian. You must put all your trust in your connection to God, otherwise, you won’t feel or be secure in your life.

Filed Under: Eternal Security, Fear versus Faith, Heart Attitude, Theology

The 4 Steps to Growing a Fruitful Marriage

February 14, 2015 by Matt Pavlik 4 Comments

You are probably thinking, “Awesome! Only four steps! I can be done next week.” But God made marriage to last a lifetime for a reason. The steps I am about to show you are real steps that we all go through at one time or another. But first, read Matthew 13:3-9.

Jesus uses the Parable of the Sower to speak about our receptivity to God’s words. Let’s consider how the parable also applies to marriage. The four types of soil in the parable match up with four types of relationships. From least to most desirable, these are Path, Rocks, Thorns, and Good Soil. The typical inexperienced couple begins as either Conflicted or Careless. Along the way, every couple experiences being Conflicted, Careless, and Choking before making it to Cooperating.

Ch01_Fruitful

The Conflicted Couple needs to learn how to experience a basic positive connection. The Careless Couple needs to experience and resolve conflict to build endurance. The Choking Couple needs to find a deeper enjoyment amidst the busyness of life. The Cooperating Couple needs to refine and maintain what they’ve accomplished so far.

As no person is perfect, no marriage is perfect. No matter which soil condition most closely describes your relationship, you can decide to grow a godly marriage by cultivating the path, clearing out the rocks, pulling out the thorns, and planting in the good soil. When you do this, you will be well on your way to yielding fruit one hundred times what was sown.

Filed Under: Growth, Heart Attitude, Marriage Tagged With: appcontent

Repentence – The Other Side of Forgiveness

July 18, 2010 by Matt Pavlik 2 Comments

Repentence + Forgiveness = Reconciliation

While the offended forgives, the offender repents. This is the only way to fully reconcile a relationship. Repentence does involve behavior change, but it must include more to be genuine. True repentence is an inward act by which we open our heart to God, so God can change it. A person can say, “I’m sorry. It won’t happen again.” But, it could be only, “I’m sorry I got caught.” There is a difference between Godly sorrow and worldly sorrow. 2 Corinthians 7:10 says, “Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation and leaves no regret, but worldly sorrow brings death.”

The Pain of an Inward Look

Looking inward is a necessary but uncomfortable part of repentence. Pride that shields our heart must be confronted and broken. Genuine repentence will result in us wanting to be good, not only acting good. We cannot be good on our own, but this is where God’s grace is needed. God is faithful to us to bring about circumstances that are intense enough to dismantle our defenses. And He does this in a way that preserves us – so we remain in relationship. Proverbs 27:6 says, “Wounds from a friend can be trusted…”

Reflections

Truly it is an evil to be full of faults, but it is a still greater evil to be full of them, and be unwilling to recognize them.
– Blaise Pascal

Christ accepts us as we are, but when He accepts us, we cannot remain as we are.
– Walter Tobisch

The stance of openness to receive is what I call the “catch” to grace. It must be received, and the Christian term for that act is repentence, the doorway to grace.
– Phillip Yancy

Resources

Book – Total Forgiveness by R.T. Kendall
– provides a comprehensive explanation of what forgiveness is and what it is not

Book – What’s So Amazing About Grace by Phillip Yancy
– provides a compeling case for no strings attached forgiveness

Prayer (Psalm 51:1-6)
1 Have mercy on me, O God,
according to your steadfast love;
according to your abundant mercy
blot out my transgressions.
2 Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity,
and cleanse me from my sin!
3 For I know my transgressions,
and my sin is ever before me.
4 Against you, you only, have I sinned
and done what is evil in your sight,
so that you may be justified in your words
and blameless in your judgment.
5 Behold, I was brought forth in iniquity,
and in sin did my mother conceive me.
6 Behold, you delight in truth in the inward being,
and you teach me wisdom in the secret heart.

Continue reading on Bible Gateway

Is there anything you need to bring to God so He can clean your heart?

Filed Under: Heart Attitude, Marriage Tagged With: appcontent

Forgiveness

June 1, 2010 by Matt Pavlik 1 Comment

What is it good for?

Forgivess is supernatural work of the Holy Spirit. It heals conflict within people, between people, and between people and God. Forgiveness removes bitterness, a cancerous blockage that infects and destroys people and relationships.

Failure to forgive is often the main obstacle to moving forward in freedom. Forgive can be broken down into “give for”, therefore, it is something God gives to us, we give to others, and others give to us.

What is it?

  • Being aware of what someone has done and still forgiving them
  • Choosing to keep no records of wrong
  • Refusing to punish
  • Not telling what they did (not gossiping)
  • Being merciful
  • Absense of bitterness

What isn’t it?

  • Approval of what was done to you
  • Excusing what they did
  • Justifying what they did
  • Pardoning what they did
  • Reconciliation of the relationship
  • Denying what they did
  • Forgetting
  • Refusing to take the wrong seriously
  • Pretending you are not hurt

Reflections

He who cannot forgive another breaks the bridge over which he must pass himself.
– George Herbert

To be a Christian means to forgive the inexcusable, because God has forgiven the inexcusable in you.
– C.S. Lewis

Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself.
– Leo Tolstoy

The most powerful agent of growth and transformation is something much more basic than any technique: a change of heart.
– John Welwood

When you blame others, you give up your power to change.
– Dr. Robert Anthony

Nothing is easy to the unwilling.
– Thomas Fuller

Resources

Book – Total Forgiveness by R.T. Kendall
– provides a comprehensive explanation of what forgiveness is and what it is not

Book – What’s So Amazing About Grace by Phillip Yancy
– provides a compeling case for no strings attached forgiveness

Prayer
Heavenly Father, I choose as an act of my will to forgive [person]. I forgive [person] for [list of specific offenses]. I release [person]. I ask you to forgive [person] for all these things as well and that you do not hold these things against [person] on my account.

Heavenly Father, I ask you to forgive me for holding unforgiveness, bitterness, resentment, etc., in my heart towards [person]. I receive your forgiveness now and your cleansing of my heart from all unrighteousness.

Heavenly Father, forgive me for holding resentment towards you for allowing these hurts to happen to me. If I have any more negative feelings stored up in me towards [person], I ask you to cleanse them from me now. I open myself to replace these negative emotions with the fruit of your Spirit (love, joy, peace, patience…)

Heavenly Father, I ask you now to heal the wounded places in my soul. Heal every memory of those offenses so that I can look back on them, realistically accepting they were hurtful, but also trusting you have healed the hurt. Enable me to use this experience to help others with whom I come into contact.

Heavenly Father, bless [person] with your abundant mercy. Prosper [person] in every way. In the name of Jesus. Amen.

Filed Under: Forgiveness, Heart Attitude, Marriage Tagged With: appcontent

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