Christian Concepts

Bringing your Potential to Light

Gender

Is Your Identity Defined By What You Do?

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Identity can’t be defined by what you do. It’s the other way around: what you do flows out of who you are.

The two are correlated though. What you do provides clues about who you are. But you are always more than what you do. And, in the case of a mistake, one moment in life doesn’t have the power to immortalize you.

What do you helps you discover your identity, but it doesn’t create or define your identity.

At the moment you came into existence, you have your identity. It serves as a map like your DNA. Life experiences are like sonar waves going out to detect your identity. Even what you do can be like identifying waves. Sometimes those waves contain distortions and you might get the wrong impression of who you are.

Your self-image is your best estimate of who you are. Your self-image is a limited, distorted version of your true identity. You limp along in life to some degree because you don’t know what it’s like to be completely free from the distortions. You can’t know, at least not in this life.

You can change your self-image to move into alignment with your identity. But your identity is fixed and unchanging for all time. That should be reassuring. You’re not aiming for at a moving target. You can become more aware of who you are.

Your identity is defined by your creator. If you want to know who you are, you need to ask God. So in this sense, who you are is somewhat of a mystery. Only God knows your identity completely.

Some people try to wrest control of their identity from their creator. “I’ll define myself my own way apart from God. I’ll manipulate my physical appearance, my body, and maybe even my DNA.” But this is only a superficial change compared to the identity God created for you.

You can observe your identity by looking at how you react to life experiences. You can also define it based on the truth found in the Bible. For example:

  • You are made in God’s image (similar to God but different, like how women are similar to men but different). See Genesis 1:26–27
  • You are a spiritual being that God made with intention. See Genesis 2:7
  • You are created to accomplish great things. See Ephesians 2:10

And there are many other defining statements in the Bible. Some of the definitions apply to everyone (everyone is made in God’s image), and some apply only to those who have become believers in Jesus Christ (Christians have a renewed spiritual connection with God and experience His love in a more intimate way – see 2 Corinthians 5:17 and Romans 5:5).

Then there are the specifics that only apply to each individual. You are unique. No one else has the same combination of abilities and perspective on life. You see God in a way that others need to hear. Your voice and contributions are needed – otherwise, God wouldn’t have bothered to create you. You are significant.

To define the specifics, you can look at your:

  • physical appearance and athletic ability
  • sex (male or female)
  • cognitive and emotional patterns and preferences
  • personality patterns
  • spiritual gifting
  • work preferences

When you start to notice the patterns in all of these, you will have a stronger sense of your identity.

As you seek your identity, remember that you aren’t self-sustaining. You can’t keep yourself alive forever. You have a distorted self-image. You need to look beyond yourself to find your identity. You are defined by your context; God is where you came from, and if you’re a believer, God is where you will return.

How are you doing with discovering your true identity? What struggles or obstacles are preventing you from realizing all God made you to be?

I posted this answer on Quora for the questions: Is our identity defined by what we do? If not, what is it defined by? If you like my answer, upvote it on Quora.

Image by Arek Socha from Pixabay

Is this a Cross?

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I recently came across a cross. Or what someone told me was a cross.

As far as I know, the artwork was done with the right heart. The inscription said something like, “God told me to leave the cross open.”

What does this picture of an “open cross” mean to you? On a positive side, it could mean that the cross is open to all. And if that means all who want to develop a relationship with God can repent and accept Jesus’s death and resurrection, I’m all for it. God’s invitation is open to all.

Being a mostly organized person I appreciate order. Most of the time my desires aren’t pathological like Monk (the Obsessive Compulsive Detective). I like symmetry. I also like abstract and symbolic art.

But for some reason, I find this depiction of the cross to be… disturbing. It feels like an attempt to be modern gone bad. It crosses over into something new age. It waters down the truth. It makes the work of Jesus look incomplete and… cheap.

In fact, the more I looked at it, the more I felt uneasy. I see a swastika, not a cross. But apparently, the swastika is a cross of sorts — a hooked cross. To some cultures, it has a positive connotation but to others, it is associated with terror (according to https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Swastika).

So, maybe this is a psychological test — a Rorschach of sorts.

What does my interpretation say about me? I’m more of a purist when it comes to truth. I look for the simple truth and become uneasy with trying to dress it up too much.

I like that God made men and women different with distinct preferences. I see consistency and meaning in gender. The physical appearance of our bodies is representative of the underlying spirit and personality God gives us. For more on gender see http://christianconcepts.com/why-gender-is-binary.

Here’s my attempt at an open cross.

I’m not saying this discussion is a matter of right or wrong. But for my own sense of peace and order, the first cross just… crosses a line for me.

What do you see and how do you feel about the first cross?

Why Gender is Binary

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Gender is binary because it’s part of your identity. Before you were born, you were a thought in God’s mind. God designed you to be either male or female.

Dictionary.com defines identity as:

The state or fact of remaining the same … under varying aspects or conditions … the sense of self, providing sameness and continuity in personality over time and sometimes disturbed in mental illnesses, as schizophrenia.

Identity can’t change. Any aspect of your identity must be permanently yours, or else it really isn’t part of you. You can lose a job, your health, or even a loved one. But no one can steal the identity God gave to you.

Changing Your Appearance Doesn’t Change Your Identity

Trying on different clothes can be fun. The purpose is finding the clothing that best fits with who are you. Moods, styles, and expressions are meant to change frequently. Clothing goes out of style all the time.

Your identity will never go out of style. Click To Tweet

Changing your hair color changes your appearance. Putting on different styles and colors of clothes accents your identity. This gives life a sense of adventure. You can paint your home a different color every day if you like.

Changing Your Thoughts Doesn’t Change Your Identity

You might be able to arbitrarily change who you think you are. You’ll never be able to change who you actually are.

Say I am a hamburger. Say it again every day when you wake up. Say it every time you feel any doubt about who you are. If you don’t know who you’re supposed to be, eventually, you might convince yourself that you’re a hamburger.

Your mind is a powerful gift. You can use it to disconnect from reality. You’ll never be able to change reality.

Be careful what you wish for. You might journey down a path leading to no place good. Life is tough. Don’t make it more difficult and confusing than it already is.

You can stop saying you’re a hamburger. Try I am made in God’s image.

God Gives You Your Identity

You have an identity that remains the same under varying circumstances. God expects us to discover what that is, not send in the bulldozers and try to out-create Him. The secret to maximum life enjoyment is aligning who you think you are with who God says you are.

You have freedom of choice but God is in control.

The heart of man plans his way,
    but the Lord establishes his steps.

—Proverbs 16:9

You can’t be whoever you want to be. You can pretend to be whoever you want to be. You can decide what you want to do with what God has given you. You can be more of exactly who God made you to be.

God Made You Male or Female as Part of Your Identity

God is a fixed point. You’re either moving away from Him or toward Him.

God defines reality. Gender is a fixed, specialized role. God assigned you a specific role to play.

God calls men and women to different roles. Otherwise, why would He have bothered to create such distinct genders?

You’re either male or female but you can express both masculine and feminine traits. There is actually significant flexibility within your role.

Most things can be done by both genders. But God made men and women to compliment each other, not compete with each other. God designed some activities especially for one gender.

If you attempt to blur your gender identity, you’ll move further away from God and who He designed you to be.

Gender Demonstrates Who God Is

God created gender to help us understand who He is. God is masculine as compared to the rest of creation. Marriage between a man and a woman, each with distinct roles, creates a picture of who God is. Marriage is a sacrament — a living picture husband and wife experience as they relate to each other. Marriage services as a constant reminder of who God is and who we are as Christ’s bride.

But I want you to understand that the head of every man is Christ, the head of a wife is her husband, and the head of Christ is God.

—1 Corinthians 11:3

The gender roles provide a clear structure of authority. God doesn’t intend for us to tinker with His design. Doing so creates a false image of who He claims to be.

Gender is binary because, as a part of creation, it communicates who God is.