Christian Concepts

Bringing your Potential to Light

Desire

Are You Too Needy Or Not Needy Enough?

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Denial is deadly. If you don’t know that you are sick, you won’t seek the remedy you need.

But how far should you go to question your emotional and spiritual health? If you don’t go far enough, you’re still in denial. Could you make a serious attempt to put off denial, but still remain in denial? It’s possible. What you don’t know, you simply don’t know.

Therefore there are two unhealthy extremes:

  1. Constant worry about whether you’re missing something. For example, maybe you still have unconfessed sin that you need to find. You feel like you need more help than even Jesus can provide.
  2. Complete denial that you have any problems. For example, you’re unwilling to consider you need help. You don’t need any help.

The problem with both of these is they bypass trusting God. God wants you to skip both worry and denial. Worry is a too activated conscience. Denial is a too under-activated conscience.

To counter-act these extremes you need two health spiritual attitudes:

  1. “I need help.” Left to yourself, you realize you wouldn’t make it very far.
  2. “Jesus is sufficient help.” Jesus has the power to fully address whatever problems you face.

Scripture speaks on both of these attitudes:

When Jesus heard this, he told them, “Healthy people don’t need a doctor—sick people do. I have come to call not those who think they are righteous, but those who know they are sinners.”

Mark 2:17 NLT

God is our refuge and strength, always ready to help in times of trouble.

Psalm 46:1 NLT

You can admit you need help, without becoming helpless. You can be in need, but not hopeless. This is a posture of waiting expectantly.

Ask God to help you see where you are sick. Unless you see, you won’t be in a position to receive God’s healing and even His blessings. Try a prayer like this:

God, help me to understand my deepest needs. You keep the secrets of your kingdom hidden from the prideful but reveal them to children (Matthew 11:25). Open my eyes to the wonder of who you are and who I am.

To receive the benefits of this prayer, see yourself as needy enough to receive God’s blessings.

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Character, Confidence, and Commitment

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Taking a look at how you spend your time will reveal your commitments. But there is even more you can find if you look deeper. You can consider how you feel about what you find, which can vary widely from pride to fear.

Even more interesting than your feelings is simply, why? Why are you focused on certain things over others? Your commitment reveals your values but your values reveal your deepest longings, the motivations of your heart.

For your heart will always pursue what you value as your treasure.

Matthew 6:21 TPT

You’ve probably heard the saying, “if you don’t know where you are going, any road will take you there.” If you’re not aware of your heart motives, you likely frequently feel lost and confused. Some of life is certainly about making discoveries about who you are. But the more you know who you are, the more responsibility you have to act on your findings.

Be Before Do

God is working to bring you to completion. He created you and He’s working to consummate His work. To do this, He builds your character, which builds your confidence. Understanding who you are is a prerequisite to accomplishing His pure plan for your life.

God is the one who began this good work in you, and I am certain that he won’t stop before it is complete on the day that Christ Jesus returns.

Philippians 1:6 CEV

The more you know who you are, the more you can make a true commitment to accomplishing a great work for God.

Commitment drives spiritual progress. When you are locked onto a target and committed to seeing it through to the end, that’s when you maximize your potential. Maximum potential leads to maximum results (eventually). Whatever you commit yourself to is the exact area in which you will increase, grow, and achieve.

Don’t be misled—you cannot mock the justice of God. You will always harvest what you plant.

Galatians 6:7 NLT

God sending Jesus in human form to sacrifice Himself for our benefit is the ultimate expression of commitment. God proved He is willing to play by the same rules He’s given us. He didn’t take a “short-cut” path to victory. He proved He can walk the talk. He’s better than any of us and therefore makes the perfect example.

What things in life matter most to you? What are you truly committed to? If you don’t like what you discover, if you aren’t committed to the right things, then as you gain a greater understanding of who you are, rededicate your efforts to what matters most.

How are you feeling right now? The purpose of my message isn’t to stir up feelings of inadequacy because you aren’t doing enough for God. I want you to see the power of commitment. I want you to see the strength and peace that comes when you stay focused on the truth. You are important to God.

The scenic route isn’t often the easiest route, but it is the most beautiful and it will be the one that will get you to where God wants you to be.

Ask God to build your character, then your confidence, and then be prepared to make a commitment to advancing God’s plans.

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How To Live With Rejection

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Confidence is the antidote to rejection. It’s easy to think that confidence is only something other people can have. But you can have it too. The secret to confidence is to stop trying to be something you’re not.

Living with the excruciating pain of rejection is hard. Some people would rather be physically beaten than be emotionally beaten.

Does anyone in the world like you? Does anyone want to spend time getting to know you? Does anyone appreciate you? Does God? If you answer these questions “no” then you are living with the oppressive feeling of rejection.

Rejection, though it feels real, is more of an illusion than a reality, if you know Jesus. God knew you before you were born. Jesus redeemed you from all sin that separated you from God. God accepts you exactly as you are.

But this doesn’t mean you won’t struggle with rejection. You have experienced some rejection and you’ll experience some more. To gain confidence, you must learn to not care about the rejection that others direct your way.

Rejection can easily become a downward spiral. None of us knows who we are as much as God knows who we are. The more you’ve experienced rejection, the more you’ve probably gone into hiding. The more you are in hiding, the more people are rejecting the false you (because you are keeping the real you out of sight). But it will still feel like people are rejecting the real you, so you end up hurting more and hiding more.

There is no good reason for anyone to reject the best parts of you that come from God. Therefore, rejection has to do with being misunderstood rather than being defective. I would guess people with obvious disabilities experience this all the time in a much more direct way. How frustrating it is to be judged superficially. How frustrating to be judged instantly and only based on your performance in one moment rather than your potential.

How much have you become your own worst enemy? If you struggle with rejection, you struggle to understand who you really are. If you’ve stopped wanting to know the real you, it will be difficult for others to see you (as in “I see you” from the movie Avatar).

God sees your potential. Your potential comes from your heart, from who God made you to be. He sees you at your best even when you look your worst. You have the best qualities that God placed in you.

But the Lord said to Samuel, “Don’t judge by his appearance or height, for I have rejected him. The Lord doesn’t see things the way you see them. People judge by outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.”

1 Samuel 16:7 NLT

If you struggle with low self-worth, you might be quick to focus on the negative part of this verse. You might be thinking, “But God rejected Eliab, so that means He most likely rejects me.”

God has the right to choose whoever He wants for what He wants to accomplish. God can’t make everybody king. Just because you are rejected for one thing, doesn’t mean you are completely rejected. God will reject you for everything He doesn’t have planned for your life. But this also means He accepts you for all the good things He has planned.

So don’t worry so much about rejection. You’ll probably be rejected 99 times out of a 100. But it’s that 1 out of 100 that matters. You only need 1. Cling to the truth that God accepts you as you are, for the purposes He has for you. Ask God to help you understand your purpose and forget about what He hasn’t chosen you for.

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Surviving On The Fringe

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Are you on the fringe? Fringe means “to be on the outskirts.” That can be good or bad depending upon what it at the center.

Last week I wrote about feeling on the outskirts of God and what He is doing in the world. But what if we flip that around and define fringe as being on the outskirts of what the world is doing? Then being on the fringe would be a good thing.

Jesus lived on the fringe while He was on earth. The leaders at the time expected Him to join them in their agenda. But Jesus certainly lived as if not engrossed in the world:

What I mean, brothers and sisters, is that the time is short. From now on those who have wives should live as if they do not; those who mourn, as if they did not; those who are happy, as if they were not; those who buy something, as if it were not theirs to keep; those who use the things of the world, as if not engrossed in them. For this world in its present form is passing away.

1 Corinthians 7:29-31 NIV

If you find yourself depressed and anxious about what is happening in the world, maybe you are too deeply engrossed? What is too engrossed? This means living as if this life is all there is. If it were all there is, you’d have to put your full hope in it. You’d have no other choice.

If you are holding too tightly to this world, you’re going to feel discouraged. You’re going to be worried because this world in its present form is passing away. But, there is another option besides hoping in this world.

If you are in Christ, you are a new creation (2 Corinthians 5:17). God has separated you out from this world. He’s brought you to the fringe. He’s sent you into the world to help it, not to be engrossed in it (1).

Don’t love the world or anything that belongs to the world. If you love the world, you cannot love the Father. Our foolish pride comes from this world, and so do our selfish desires and our desire to have everything we see. None of this comes from the Father. The world and the desires it causes are disappearing. But if we obey God, we will live forever.

1 John 2:15-17 CEV

Jesus had no place to lay His head (Luke 9:58). Of course, this doesn’t mean that He never slept lying down. It means He didn’t ever settle down as if this was His permanent home.

Sure – it’s okay to own a home and live in it. More important that where you live is how attached you are to your life in this world. It’s impossible to be completely satisfied with this world. If you try to find your life somewhere in the world, you will feel empty and disappointed.

But if you join Jesus at the fringe, you will find your life and you’ll be in good company. You can be on the fringe and not feel lonely.

If you’ve been engrossed in the world, it takes time to detach from it. At some point you have to let go of the world.

Have you ever lost something and become focused on finding it? What if you can’t find it? Eventually you have to move on. If you spend your life consumed with what you’ve lost, your life will be compromised. It won’t be all it could be.

Imagine what it feels like to let go of what you’ve lost and move on. That’s what you need to do with the world. The world isn’t as great as you thought it was. That’s good or bad depending upon how you look at it. If you can give up on finding your ultimate happiness in it, you’ll end up content and peaceful.

(1) https://www.desiringgod.org/articles/lets-revise-the-popular-phrase-in-but-not-of
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Are You Being Stubborn Or Tenacious?

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Have you ever behaved irrationally? I have. Irrational behavior is just another way of stubbornly clinging to your biases. It’s also a cry to be recognized for who you are.

What happens when a life event confronts who you think you are? That’s an identity crisis. In the worst case, it seriously threatens your sense of well-being.

You need to feel inner stability. You need an identity. A lack of identity feels like sinking without reaching a firm bottom. You feel squishy, inadequate, and ashamed.

Choosing Stubbornness For Stability

Because the need for stability is so strong, it’s possible to settle for a false sense of security. This can sometimes be okay when you need a quick moment to catch your breath. Life can be intimidating sometimes. But a quick fix won’t last long. A consistent pattern of avoidance isn’t healthy.

Stubbornness has a negative connotation. Stubborn people pursue self-protection even when it costs them their integrity. They lie and people-please to minimize their contact with reality.

Stubborn people are prideful. They are like the people who build their house on the sand instead of the rock. There house might go up quickly, but it won’t last nearly as long as the house built upon the rock.

“Everyone then who hears these words of mine and does them will be like a wise man who built his house on the rock. And the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house, but it did not fall, because it had been founded on the rock. And everyone who hears these words of mine and does not do them will be like a foolish man who built his house on the sand. And the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell, and great was the fall of it.”

Matthew 7:24-27 ESV

The need to feel good about yourself creates a strong temptation to remain biased. Every person has the right to choose, but it doesn’t mean everyone is right. People are irrational. They can say the sky is purple because it supports their inner reality. They can even go so far as to insist that the sky is always purple. They might do this because they don’t like living with change.

Experiencing inner stability is important. You should seek to achieve it first. But then, if you want to participate in a meaningful reality, the next step is to seek the truth.

Choosing Tenacity For Truth

As disruptive as the truth might be, it’s the only way to construct a firm foundation. In order to seek God and His truth, you must be willing to give up the false-security of your biases. To be tenacious, you must humble yourself.

Tenacity has positive, forward momentum. A tenacious person pursues a higher goal without ever giving up. The truth is welcomed even when it produces a temporary set-back.

Tenacious people are willing to look at whatever inaccuracies, faults, or flat out lies are preventing them from moving forward. They care more about the higher cause than how comfortable they are. Therefore, they are willing to give up their self-protective pretenses.

How about you? Are you willing to sacrifice your comfort in order to build something lasting?

If so, it’s okay to start small. Try to simply be aware of your biases and self-protective ways. When you are ready, take the risk to be tenacious.

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The Paradox of Humility

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No one can claim they are the humblest person in the world with much credibility. But those of us who struggle with self-worth know that confidence is equally elusive.

Somehow though, confidence and humility are the same thing. If you are confident (but not arrogant), you’ll also be humble. And if you’re humble (but not engaging in false humility), you’ll also be confident.

Doesn’t that seem strange that appropriate confidence, the kind God wants us to have, is also a way to express humility? I mean strange in the sense that confident probably isn’t the first word that comes to mind when you think of humility. But how could it be any other way?

God who is all powerful clothed Himself with humanity. If there is a paradox, Jesus represents it perfectly.

To be strong doesn’t mean to be closed or unreachable. God’s strength is approachable. Jesus’s birth offers us the greatest hope possible.

We are creatures of habit. Once we know how to do something, we go on autopilot.

If you’ve ever experienced a negative, false belief about yourself, you know firsthand the intense struggle that is required to put off the false and put on the truth.

You can’t have confidence and humility without also having peace and joy.

Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light.”

Matthew 11:28-30 NLT

In your quest to become more confident and humble, remember that it feels like peace, joy, and rest. I bless you now with rest for your soul. Amen.

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